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Ask Me Anything: The Dave Experience

Sep 17, 2009#1

Dave

Okay, this is my section. Ask me anything and I'll answer it honestly. I'm not going to give an area of expertise because I honestly don't think I'm better at any one thing than anyone else, which makes me a bit sad.

Sep 17, 2009#2

fade

Tighty whities or boxers? Or a lady's thong?

Sep 17, 2009#3

Dave

fade said:
Tighty whities or boxers? Or a lady's thong?

Boxer briefs. The thong is for special occasions.

Sep 17, 2009#4

ThatNickGuy

What's three things you like most about Halforum?
Three things you like the least?

Sep 17, 2009#5

Drachenherz

Do you really have hooties?

(Come on, you saw that coming, didn't you?)

Sep 17, 2009#6

Dave

ThatNickGuy said:
What's three things you like most about Halforum?
Three things you like the least?

Likes:

1) The people. This is the biggest by far. As I've said before, a whole bunch of these people could crash on my couch. Although some of the ladies might be a bit hard to explain.
2) The Challenge. This has been a totally new and constant learning experience for me. I've learned a whole bunch and made some mistakes but if I could make my living just doing board stuff I think I would do it.
3) Diversity. We have a lot of different people here and I've learned a lot from you guys. Good and bad. Plus the fact that we have so many different demographics is very cool to me.

Hates:

1) DRAMA! This is my #1 pet peeve. People can be real assholes sometimes. I know that it's not always taken as meant but it's weird how people react.
2) Inexperience. This is my own inexperience I'm speaking of. I keep messing with stuff but I'm always afraid I'm going to bork something up that's unborkable. I'm getting better but I hate this.
3) My inability to get traffic moving here. I thought that I'd be good at this but everything I've tried so far has done nothing more than frustrate me. I'm hoping the hub takes off.

Andi said:
Do you really have hooties?

(Come on, you saw that coming, didn't you?)

I really don't. I've got more of a gut than I used to but I still have to wear a training bra so no flappy hooties in real life.

Sep 17, 2009#7

fade

Dave;257433][quote=fade said:
Tighty whities or boxers? Or a lady's thong?

Boxer briefs. The thong is for special occasions.[/QUOTE]

Ah, boxer briefs. Underwear for the noncommittal man.

Sep 17, 2009#8

Dave

fade;257450][quote=Dave;257433][quote=fade said:
Tighty whities or boxers? Or a lady's thong?

Boxer briefs. The thong is for special occasions.[/quote]

Ah, boxer briefs. Underwear for the noncommittal man.[/QUOTE]

They are more comfortable, they don't restrict my boys but they are tight enough so that I'm not flopping around and in constant need of readjusting.

Sep 17, 2009#9

Fun Size

Wow, we got to TMI way too fast that time.

Were you ever uncomfortable with your daughter hanging around with us hooligans?

Sep 17, 2009#10

Soliloquy

What have you tried so far to get traffic here? How did they turn out?

Sep 17, 2009#11

Dave

Fun Size said:
Were you ever uncomfortable with your daughter hanging around with us hooligans?

Not really. I'm pretty open with her about stuff. I figured she wouldn't stick around too long.

---------- Post added at 02:31 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:29 PM ----------

Soliloquy said:
What have you tried so far to get traffic here? How did they turn out?

I tried the front page being a review site but nobody wrote reviews (or at least very few did). I had some spikes in traffic but when they saw nothing had been updated the bounce rate went from 50% to around 85-90%.

I then worked with Mycohl...who am I kidding? Mycohl did it all!...and got the custom comics working and that had mixed results. But in the end it didn't bring in anyone new.

Sep 17, 2009#12

ThatNickGuy

Dave said:
They are more comfortable, they don't restrict my boys but they are tight enough so that I'm not flopping around and in constant need of readjusting.

Dave, we were talking about underwear for your bottom half, not upper. *ducks!*

Sep 17, 2009#13

Dave

ThatNickGuy;257499][quote=Dave said:
They are more comfortable, they don't restrict my boys but they are tight enough so that I'm not flopping around and in constant need of readjusting.

Dave, we were talking about underwear for your bottom half, not upper. *ducks!*[/QUOTE]

Excellent point. I'll take that into consideration for next time.

Sep 17, 2009#14

Andromache

would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Sep 17, 2009#15

ThatNickGuy

Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

I'll bet Tinwhistler's waiting with bated breath for that answer!

Sep 17, 2009#16

Dave

Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Probably not. I mean, there's money to be made from that model (or at least there was before YouPorn and MyFreePaySite) but most folks that would pay for those sites would not be interested in a forum.

Sep 17, 2009#17

Andromache

Right. I'll go get dressed then.

Sep 17, 2009#18

Dave

Crone said:
Right. I'll go get dressed then.

Damn it! I knew I answered that one wrong.

Sep 17, 2009#19

ThatNickGuy

Crone said:
Right. I'll go get dressed then.

*sighs in a deflated tone* Me too.

Sep 17, 2009#20

phil

What is best in life?

Sep 17, 2009#21

Tinwhistler

ThatNickGuy;257517][quote=Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

I'll bet Tinwhistler's waiting with bated breath for that answer![/QUOTE]

Umh, not really.

Sep 17, 2009#22

Dave

phil said:
What is best in life?

Being on stage and having 300 people laughing hysterically at your comedy. You feel the rush of energy and it's the best thing in the world.

The worst? Being on stage and having 300 people looking at you like you have lobsters crawling out of your ears. Eating it on stage is a nightmare.

Sep 17, 2009#23

Bonhomme Richard

I'd pay to see lobsters crawl out of your ears.

Sep 17, 2009#24

Dave

Bonhomme Richard said:
I'd pay to see lobsters crawl out of your ears.

Several people did. It wasn't pretty.

Sep 17, 2009#25

Bonhomme Richard

Do you ever use stories from the forum in your act?

Sep 17, 2009#26

Dave

Bonhomme Richard said:
Do you ever use stories from the forum in your act?

No. I stopped doing comedy WAY before I started this thing. Besides, personal stories that only a few people get and require prior experience and knowledge tend to go over badly.

I had to stop comedy because I was on the verge of being a touring comedian and I had to choose to stop or keep going all out. I stopped because of my family.

Sep 17, 2009#27

North_Ranger

What is the weirdest thing the audience has thrown at you?

Sep 17, 2009#28

phil

no one ever does it. =(

When is the next podcast?

Sep 17, 2009#29

Dave

North_Ranger said:
What is the weirdest thing the audience has thrown at you?

I've never had anything thrown at me and the only really back heckler I've ever had was a drunk guy I worked with. He felt because he knew me he could yell shit out.

But no shoes or panties or anything like that.

phil said:
When is the next podcast?

This coming Sunday. The topic is: "The Geeks Talk about Social Networking Sites".

Sep 17, 2009#30

Bonhomme Richard

Dave;257554][quote=Bonhomme Richard said:
Do you ever use stories from the forum in your act?

Sep 17, 2009#31

phil

still at noon?

Sep 17, 2009#32

sixpackshaker

If you lick a fly-swatter, will you die?

Sep 17, 2009#33

Dave

phil said:
still at noon?

Yes. Noon CST.

sixpackshaker said:
If you lick a fly-swatter, will you die?

Depends on what's on the swatter. Probably not, though. I still wouldn't do it unless you paid me a lot of money first.

Sep 17, 2009#34

sixpackshaker

How much would it cost to get you to lick a 'freshly' used fly-swatter?

Sep 17, 2009#35

Qonas

Have you ever actually husked corn? If so, were you viciously assaulted by a live wolverine in the attempt?

Sep 17, 2009#36

Adammon

Who is the most famous person you've ever touched?

Sep 17, 2009#37

Silvanesti

Adammon said:
Who is the most famous person you've ever touched?

Sep 17, 2009#38

Dave

sixpackshaker said:
How much would it cost to get you to lick a 'freshly' used fly-swatter?

Depends on the time of the month. No, that's NOT what I mean by that! I get paid monthly. So at the beginning of the month I'd charge you $100. Near the end of the month it would be down to a happy meal and a bottle of Pepsi.

Qonas said:
Have you ever actually husked corn? If so, were you viciously assaulted by a live wolverine in the attempt?

I actually have husked corn before. Several times, in fact. I'm quite good at it. No wolverines, though.

---------- Post added at 06:19 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:19 PM ----------

Adammon said:
Who is the most famous person you've ever touched?

The lead singer of Cheap Trick. We played putt putt golf together at the Fuddruckers in Fargo, ND some time in the 1990s.

Sep 17, 2009#39

Hylian

Who are your top 10 favorite posters?

(and this is a joke you don't actually have to answer)

Sep 17, 2009#40

North_Ranger

Where do you see yourself in 20 years?

Sep 17, 2009#41

HCGLNS

Have you ever DJ'ed a deaf wedding?

Sep 17, 2009#42

Dave

hylian said:
Who are your top 10 favorite posters?

I'm very fond of a lot of you. Normally I wouldn't answer this one because as Admin it would look like I am taking sides in any dispute. But because Zen is now the arbitrator of the boomstick and I'm not involved I will answer. And these are in no certain order, by the way.

Shegokigo - She brings a level of insanity to the boards that I like. Yes, the shtick sometimes seems forced, but for the most part it's good fun.
GasBandit - His views and mine politically don't even come close to one another, but he sticks to his guns and is unflinching. Plus he's always making things interesting.
Charlie Dont Surf - He's brash, he's too young to be so set in his ways and he's a movie snob. But he's interesting and even when bored he brings a certain something to the boards. Look at this mini-meme he started!
Lucid JCM - As opposed to the ranting lunatic JCM that occasionally rears his ugly head. Really the only time I've ever lost it on someone was the batshit insane JCM. But Lucid JCM brings a view to the board that we would normally not get. Namely the insight - important insight - into the mind of a member of a religion with which the United States is currently at war. His posts on the subject are a real treat...before they spiral down into flaming drivel and implode.
Chazwozel - This one could be one of a few people, but Chaz comes to mind first. We have a number of scientists on this board and the professional information we get from these folks is invaluable to understanding things like cloning, virology and the current global pandemic. Yes, he can be acerbic. But you have to realize that he means almost none of it and if you fall for his poking and prodding he just won.
Crone - I like the newer, calmer Crone. Her posts are funny and she's always been there with a laugh. We've had our differences in the past but I respect the hell out of her. Shit, we voted her Forum President!
SeraRealm - The funny and beautiful version of GasBandit with the GB hoard at her disposal. Although a great number of posts contain what Charlie refers to as "image macros", her posts never fail to elicit a chuckle or even the occasional guffaw. I hope she's right now very happy getting her marriage on.
Gusto - Having spoken with him several times on the Vent and D&D games & such I find I like GOOSTO personally and that tends to color my views of his posts somewhat.
Calleja - Even though he hasn't been around as much, the Happy Mexican is a great guy who has shared so much personal information with us at his own expense that I'm amazed. Come back, ya crazy Mex, ya!
My Mods & Admins - I chose these folks for a reason. For the most part they are very even tempered and they are ALL easy to work with. The private section you guys can't see is drama free and I likes it that way.

North_Ranger said:
Where do you see yourself in 20 years?

In 20 years I'll be 64 years old. I hope to God I'm able to start thinking about retirement although by that time I hope to have written something that someone likes enough to publish so I can sit in my boxer briefs at the computer and still make a living.

HCGLNS said:
Have you ever DJ'ed a deaf wedding?

Actually, one of the wedding I did had a deaf bridesmaid. But that's about the extent of it. I wished I knew sign language at the time.

Sep 17, 2009#43

phil

What should I have for dinner? Kinda diggin' a pizza. Should I have a pizza?

Sep 17, 2009#44

Dave

phil said:
What should I have for dinner? Kinda diggin' a pizza. Should I have a pizza?

There's no such thing as bad pizza. It's always a safe bet.

Sep 17, 2009#45

phil

peperoni, or supreme?

Sep 17, 2009#46

Qonas

What baseball team do Nebraskans tend to root for?

Sep 18, 2009#47

North_Ranger

How much should one tip cows?

Sep 18, 2009#48

Dave

phil said:
peperoni, or supreme?

I prefer Canadian Bacon, otherwise known as ham. But if I had to choose I'd say pepperoni due to the fact that I am not a fan of vegetables on my pizza.

Qonas said:
What baseball team do Nebraskans tend to root for?

Generally it's the Kansas City Royals. The miner league team in Omaha is the Omaha Royals so we have that connection plus the fact that KC is one of the closest franchises. Personally I'm a Minnesota Twin.

North_Ranger said:
How much should one tip cows?

20% just like everyone else.

Sep 18, 2009#49

Drachenherz

When will you stop answering questions in this thread?

Sep 18, 2009#50

fade

(I keed)

Also, will we be privy to a "Comedy stylings of Dave" podcast anytime soon?

Also, when can we get a laugh track mod for the forum. Guaranteed to make each post 10 X more hilarious™. 9 out of 10 Balkis agree.

Sep 18, 2009#51

Dave

Andi said:
When will you stop answering questions in this thread?

When people get tired of asking them.

fade said:
Also, will we be privy to a "Comedy stylings of Dave" podcast anytime soon?

Hadn't even thought about that. Interesting idea. But do I really want to take the time to write fresh material for a medium where you get no feedback and have no idea if the material is working? Let me think about this.

fade said:
Also, when can we get a laugh track mod for the forum. Guaranteed to make each post 10 X more hilarious™. 9 out of 10 Balkis agree.

Laugh track? Not sure we want to incorporate sound clips. It would take up space and could become very annoying.

Sep 18, 2009#52

fade

(I was kidding about the laugh track)

Sep 18, 2009#53

Dave

fade said:
(I was kidding about the laugh track)

I know.

Sep 18, 2009#54

sixpackshaker

North_Ranger said:
How much should one tip cows?

90 degrees, if you tip them any further you would have hit them too hard.

Sep 18, 2009#55

Fun Size

Have you ever stuck your finger in your bellybutton, rubbed it around, and then smelled it?

Sep 18, 2009#56

Dave

Fun Size said:
Have you ever stuck your finger in your bellybutton, rubbed it around, and then smelled it?

Can't say that I have. It's possible, though. Mostly I just pick out lint and wonder how it got in there.

Sep 18, 2009#57

Fun Size

Are you going to now that I've put the idea in your head?

Sep 18, 2009#58

Dave

Fun Size said:
Are you going to now that I've put the idea in your head?

Probably not. But I'm more curious than I would have been.

Sep 18, 2009#59

Jake

Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Dave, do you honestly think Crone still has amateur status?

Sep 18, 2009#60

Dave

Jake;258387][quote=Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Dave, do you honestly think Crone still has amateur status?[/QUOTE]

I have no proof to the contrary. That I know of.

Sep 18, 2009#61

Drachenherz

Dave;258705][quote=Jake;258387][quote=Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Dave, do you honestly think Crone still has amateur status?[/quote]

I have no proof to the contrary. That I know of.[/QUOTE]

Do you really know how Crone looks like?

Sep 18, 2009#62

Dave

Andi;258712][quote=Dave;258705][quote=Jake;258387][quote=Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Dave, do you honestly think Crone still has amateur status?[/quote]

I have no proof to the contrary. That I know of.[/quote]

Do you really know how Crone looks like?

[/QUOTE]

If she was truthful about the pictures she posted then sure. But if she posted pictures that weren't her I'd have no way of knowing. I mean, you all know that I look as I look because I post a picture from my DJ job and that would be an incredibly elaborate ruse to fake. But a picture or two uploaded could be of anyone.

I think I have but you can never be 100% sure.

Sep 18, 2009#63

Cajungal

Do you have a list of 5 celebrity ladies you'd have sex with if you had the chance?

Sep 18, 2009#64

phil

And what about 5 celebrity dudes?

If you could get this place exactly how you want it, what would it be like?

Sep 18, 2009#65

CrimsonSoul

Three parter:
1. Dave you ever going to come visit me in Texas so we can go shooting?

2. Do you see the hot air machines and think push button recieve bacon?

3. When can I tap dat?

Sep 18, 2009#66

ThatGrinningIdiot!

After experiencing the full power of "The Dave" I feel cheated and unsatisfied, do I get a full refund?

Sep 18, 2009#67

Drachenherz

CrimsonSoul said:
Three parter:
...

2. Do you see the hot air machines and think push button recieve bacon?

...

I definitely do.

DAMN YOU HALFORUM!

Sep 18, 2009#68

phil

Oh! another one I thought of. If you were a wacky radio DJ what would your show be like? Assume you a re "Demented Dave" and this is your "Destructive Drive time" or something, who would be your sidekick, the one who asks all the people you interview how big their dong is? Who would be in intern who has to do the stupid stunts, and who would be the chick who thinks you're all just gross?

Sep 18, 2009#69

Andromache

Dave;258811][quote=Andi;258712][quote=Dave;258705][quote=Jake;258387][quote=Crone said:
would you be willing to turn this into an amateur porn site?

Dave, do you honestly think Crone still has amateur status?[/quote]

I have no proof to the contrary. That I know of.[/quote]

Do you really know how Crone looks like?

Sep 19, 2009#70

Dave

Cajungal said:
Do you have a list of 5 celebrity ladies you'd have sex with if you had the chance?

Salma Hayek - My overall #1. I would be able to die happy after 1 night alone with her.
Kathy Ireland - As long as she doesn't speak. She's kinda dumb but those eyes...
Jennifer Aniston - Just because she's hot.
Mila Kunis - Have you SEEN her lately?!?
Megan Fox - You would have to shut her up and make sure that she doesn't try and act in front of me but even vacuous Megan is super hot.

phil said:
And what about 5 celebrity dudes?

Well, I'm not gay so the prospect doesn't turn me on. But throw a million tax free at me and I'd probably lower myself and then take a long, long shower.

phil said:
If you could get this place exactly how you want it, what would it be like?

A centralized hub of activity that is constantly bringing in new users so that even if a few leave we're still okay and not stagnating.

CrimsonSoul said:
Three parter:
1. Dave you ever going to come visit me in Texas so we can go shooting?

That would be really interesting...as long as you aren't Dick Cheney. But I'd suck as I'm really rusty with my shooting. I haven't touched a weapon in 20+ years.

CrimsonSoul said:
2. Do you see the hot air machines and think push button receive bacon?

You know, I really do now. And it always makes me laugh.

CrimsonSoul said:
3. When can I tap dat?

See the quote about dudes above.

phil said:
Oh! another one I thought of. If you were a wacky radio DJ what would your show be like? Assume you a re "Demented Dave" and this is your "Destructive Drive time" or something, who would be your sidekick, the one who asks all the people you interview how big their dong is? Who would be in intern who has to do the stupid stunts, and who would be the chick who thinks you're all just gross?

I would do a call-in show where I'd basically be an "answer" guy. So people would send us questions and we'd answer them and talk about nothing for 4-5 hours a day. No stupid stunts or anything like that. I'd actually want a "serious" type of talk show where the personalities make the difference, not the wacky stunts.

Crone said:
wait, when did this become about me? how do I make it stop?

When someone asked a question. I answered and now it's over.

Sep 19, 2009#71

North_Ranger

Be ye happy with yer current situation in life, generally speakin'?

Sep 19, 2009#72

CrimsonSoul

Arrrr ye a Pirate?

Sep 19, 2009#73

Bubble181

If you hadn't started this forum, who do you think would've done so as successfully or more successfully than you? And would you have rather had that, or this?

What do you hope for most in your children?

What is your greatest fear?

Why aren't I in your top-ten list? :waah:

How often have you wished harm on someone else and really meant it?

Sep 19, 2009#74

fade

When you imagine yourself (as a player in an average daily thought process), who or what are you?

Sep 20, 2009#75

Dave

North_Ranger said:
Be ye happy with yer current situation in life, generally speakin'?

Had you asked me last night I'd have said yes. But then this morning I got into a fight with the wife and the answer is not so clear.

CrimsonSoul said:
Arrrr ye a Pirate?

No, I missed it.

Bubble181 said:
If you hadn't started this forum, who do you think would've done so as successfully or more successfully than you? And would you have rather had that, or this?

Not sure. I think Zappit would have done a good job but I am not sure he would have known what he was getting in for. I think there's a lot of you who would have done a fine job. And sometimes I wish they had done it but wishing is counterproductive. I'm content.

Bubble181 said:
What do you hope for most in your children?

That they are more successful than me in life, love and everything.

Bubble181 said:
What is your greatest fear?

Don't know. Maybe that I'll be outed as a totally worthless member of society who has no marketable skills. I'd have no rebuttal to the accusation.

Bubble181 said:
Why aren't I in your top-ten list? :waah:

Because I had to choose 10 out of 700. I knew I'd miss someone.

Bubble181 said:
How often have you wished harm on someone else and really meant it?

Very rarely. Even though I'm a former Marine I'm pretty pacifistic. I wished harm on Michael Jackson and every other pedophile. I hope the couple that kept the kid in the shed die and untimely painful death. Other than that I can't think of anyone.

fade said:
When you imagine yourself (as a player in an average daily thought process), who or what are you?

I can't imagine myself as anyone other than me. Unless I'm misunderstanding the question.

Sep 20, 2009#76

Andromache

Would you be ok replacing me with Bubble on the top ten list? He might really get upset, and I'm contractually required to act like I hate you anyway.

Sep 20, 2009#77

Dave

Crone said:
Would you be ok replacing me with Bubble on the top ten list? He might really get upset, and I'm contractually required to act like I hate you anyway.

Nope. Not your list. Hate me all you want.

He'll get over it.

Sep 20, 2009#78

North_Ranger

Who do you resemble more, your father or your mother? And how?

Sep 20, 2009#79

Dave

North_Ranger said:
Who do you resemble more, your father or your mother? And how?

My father. We both have a penis. Other than that I resemble neither. I'm adopted so that makes sense.

Sep 20, 2009#80

Wasabi Poptart

Have you ever used a Magic 8 Ball to give you an answer to a problem?

Sep 20, 2009#81

Bubble181

Dave;259872][quote=Crone said:
Would you be ok replacing me with Bubble on the top ten list? He might really get upset, and I'm contractually required to act like I hate you anyway.

Nope. Not your list. Hate me all you want.

He'll get over it.[/QUOTE]

Honestly, if either of you think I actually care, you're mistaken.

That aside, :waah: I'm not on it! :waah:

Sep 20, 2009#82

Dave

WildSoul said:
Have you ever used a Magic 8 Ball to give you an answer to a problem?

*shakes Magic 8 Ball*

The signs point to no.

Sep 21, 2009#83

Shegokigo

Pssst, the quote is "All signs point to no". :slywink:

Sep 21, 2009#84

Dave

Shegokigo said:
Pssst, the quote is "All signs point to no". :slywink:

Further validating my answer of never having used one.

Sep 21, 2009#85

phil

Do you ever confuse yourself with David? Perhaps you'll see David's art thread and think "I didn't make no art!" but then realize that you're not david.

Sep 21, 2009#86

Dave

phil said:
Do you ever confuse yourself with David? Perhaps you'll see David's art thread and think "I didn't make no art!" but then realize that you're not david.

Every. Fucking. Time.

Which really pisses me off because he's FAR more talented than I am.

Sep 21, 2009#87

phil

You should change his name to David- NOT THE ADMIN BUT ANOTHER GUY WITH A SIMILAR NAME! THIS ONE DRAWS STUFF!

and make it so he can't auto log in. He has to type it every time.

Sep 21, 2009#88

Dave

phil said:
You should change his name to David- NOT THE ADMIN BUT ANOTHER GUY WITH A SIMILAR NAME! THIS ONE DRAWS STUFF!

and make it so he can't auto log in. He has to type it every time.

I could but that would be petty and small. Plus starting to do stuff like that has to be done very carefully and only to those with whom you are fairly close as it could be misconstrued as an abuse of power.

I never want to be accused of having abused any perceived power I have.

Sep 21, 2009#89

phil

pfffffffft what is power for, if not to be abused?

Sep 21, 2009#90

Dave

phil said:
pfffffffft what is power for, if not to be abused?

With mediocre power comes mediocre responsibility.

Sep 21, 2009#91

Andromache

geez, get it right:

power is for using, PEOPLE are for abusing.

Sep 21, 2009#92

North_Ranger

What is your greatest regret?

Sep 21, 2009#93

Gusto

North_Ranger said:
What is your greatest regret?

That he has boneitis.

Sep 21, 2009#94

Cajungal

Gusto;260670][quote=North_Ranger said:
What is your greatest regret?

That he has boneitis.[/QUOTE]

:rofl:

dundun DUNDUN dundundun DUNDUN

Sep 21, 2009#95

Dave

North_Ranger said:
What is your greatest regret?

This is a really tough one. Probably the time I robbed the neighbor's house. I was 14 and a friend of mine and I were watching their dogs while they were away. Instead I stole a jar of change and got caught.

My dad beat the hell out of me.

Sep 22, 2009#96

Fun Size

Do you regret that you did it, or that you got caught?

Sep 22, 2009#97

Dave

Fun Size said:
Do you regret that you did it, or that you got caught?

Both. The worst part wasn't getting the hell beaten out of me but having to return the stuff face to face with my neighbor. That singular act killed off the thief in me.

Sep 22, 2009#98

Shannow

Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?

Sep 22, 2009#99

Dave

Shannow said:
Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?

Trying to work, but my computer won't let me.

Sep 22, 2009#100

Shannow

I wouldnt do that, Dave.

Sep 23, 2009#101

Qonas

Parris Island or San Diego? OOH RAH!

Sep 23, 2009#102

Dave

Qonas said:
Parris Island or San Diego? OOH RAH!

San Diego. And since MCRD is right next to the San Diego airport you got to watch the planes fly from beyond this tiny, tiny fence.

Sep 23, 2009#103

Qonas

Oh great, you missed the lovely sandfleas and swamp climate. I hate you.

Sep 23, 2009#104

Dave

Qonas said:
Oh great, you missed the lovely sandfleas and swamp climate. I hate you.

It wasn't roses and honey where I was at but I am glad I missed the sand fleas.

Sep 23, 2009#105

Jake

Reminds me of a few years ago when my cousin went to Parris Island. It somehow got spread around the family that we should send him care packages. Every one he got sent him to a pit for push-ups with the sand fleas while his sergeants ate the goodies. :rofl:

Sep 23, 2009#106

North_Ranger

Tell us your most memorable experience in the service (barring any that might lead to you having to kill us).

Sep 23, 2009#107

Dave

North_Ranger said:
Tell us your most memorable experience in the service (barring any that might lead to you having to kill us).

Sep 23, 2009#108

North_Ranger

Dave;261893][quote=North_Ranger said:
Tell us your most memorable experience in the service (barring any that might lead to you having to kill us).

I was the Safety NCO at the pistol range at Edson Range in Camp Pendleton. I had the fortune to watch a guy put 5 rounds into a target at 25 meters ( I believe it was 25 meters) and then put the pistol under his chin. Nothing anyone could do. All safety procedures had been followed and we issued an immediate cease fire. The pistol was taken from his hands and disabled. We cleared the range and went through a cursory questioning.

I never learned his name.[/QUOTE]

Jeebus Harry Christ...

Sounds something that apparently happened at Huovinrinne Garrison a few years back (heard this while I was doing my service there in '03): during live-fire practice on the assault rifle firing ram some idiot jams his rifle. He keeps pressing the trigger, nothing happens. In such a case you are supposed to signal one of the NCOs present and ask for clearance to get up. But this guy apparently just got up and kept pulling the trigger as he turned to face the NCO, the rifle turning as well and pointing the NCO straight in the guts.

The NCO punched the guy's lights out and disarmed him.

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