I think I'm going to have to take my wife's debit card away from her and force her to de-link her bank account from her iTunes account; or just have her change her direct deposit to my credit union so she has to ask me for money. In the last 8 days she has spent $250 on audio books on iTunes, and $150 on snacks/lunches for work. I'm eating fucking cup-noodle and drinking the free crappy coffee and OJ at work, and today for lunch she bought: apples, pretzels, croissants, chocolate, ice cream bites, wafer cookies, and whoppers, plus Emergen-C and Airborne and spent $50. The kicker? Last night before leaving work (when I was trying to see if we had enough money for me to buy a full tank of gas or just enough to last until payday - it was the latter) I noticed that she'd spent $250 on iTunes and $100 on food for work. We discussed it, at length, when I got home. Not 12 hours later she got up, got ready for work, left the house, and went straight to the grocery store and dropped another $50 on junk food.
The biggest problem is that she's a stress spender. And right now, we're stressed because we're trying to move and pay off some major bills and we need to spend less money. So in order to alleviate her stress about spending too much money, she spends more money. Eventually, she has no money to pay bills with and they go to collections, and she can never pay the collections, and they go to court and her credit (and now mine) is fucked. And she wants to buy a house. I can get her to intellectually understand that we'll never have a house if she doesn't stop fucking spending money like it's going out of style, but I can't stop her from doing it anyway. And it's not like I'm a saint when it comes to saving money. It took me seven years to get to the point where I didn't treat my overdraft protection like a $500 spending allowance, and to be responsible enough to have a credit card that I don't go over limit on, and that I pay every single month. But damn it! I'm scrimping and saving, changing insurance companies for better rates, giving up food that I like because we can't afford it, buying cheaper dinners, not going out to eat more than once a month or so, trying to find more fuel efficient routes to get to work (unfortunately mass transit, while an option, is more expensive than driving and takes just as long to get to work), crafting exquisitely intricate budgets to try to get us out of the hell hole that was created by us both being unemployed (and her past spending problems) without having to fucking declare bankruptcy (we actually don't own enough/owe enough to actually consider doing this) and as soon as money hits her checking account, it's spent. And it isn't even spent on material things. It's not like she's buying clothes or shoes or purses or outerwear, or anything that she has anything to show for spending all that damn money on. It's spent on audio books and junk food.