[Rant] Minor Rant III: For a Few Hollers More

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fade

Staff member
Is it a job requirement to be 20, unshaven, and arrogant to work at a bike shop? Do your employers request that you are openly derisive to customers with bikes that are less that $2000? Must you make comments like "oh for a low end bike like that, a bottom bracket would run you only about $25". Did it need the low end? I can pretty much guarantee I've logged more miles on this "low end" Trek than you have on your Ultra Super Specialized 5001 that looks like it rolled off the showroom floor. Those gashes in my paint are because I actually use my mountain bike for--wait for it--mountain biking, you pretentious ass.

I have moved all over this country, and regardless of where I go, "bike shop guy" exists.
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

fade said:
Is it a job requirement to be 20, unshaven, and arrogant to work at a bike shop? Do your employers request that you are openly derisive to customers with bikes that are less that $2000? Must you make comments like "oh for a low end bike like that, a bottom bracket would run you only about $25". Did it need the low end? I can pretty much guarantee I've logged more miles on this "low end" Trek than you have on your Ultra Super Specialized 5001 that looks like it rolled off the showroom floor. Those gashes in my paint are because I actually use my mountain bike for--wait for it--mountain biking, you pretentious ass.

I have moved all over this country, and regardless of where I go, "bike shop guy" exists.
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He is a phantom, pursuing you from town to town. He's waiting for you to like him.
 
S

SeraRelm

"Welcome to Texas Roadhouse, it's loud as fuck and we add some baked potato to your pile of salt."
 
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fade

Staff member
Dear Oatmeal:

I normally think you're pretty funny, but I'm guessing you're out of shape. People don't post their workouts on Facebook to brag, they post it for encouragement. FB is one of the greatest workout motivators.
 
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fade

Staff member
It's not like I update my status like "Dude, I just totally crushed 100 reps" or something. I use a logger, and it posts automatically. I could turn it off, but I like people "Like"ing it. Gives me that push to do it again.
 
S

SeraRelm

The chicken was alright, though I still feel like I'm gonna die from salt intake. I think there may have been some corn in my side of butter soup too.
 
M

makare

That's how i feel when i eat at Outback Steakhouse. The food is good buy holy crap salty.
 
S

SeraRelm

I don't like steak. It's not a theological thing, I just don't like it.
 
S

SeraRelm

I thought I had ordered corn as my side dish but I must have said butter soup because of the contents in the bowl they brought to me.
 
M

makare

Wtf is my cat's problem? He sits at the window staring longingly outside but when I take him out there he freaks out and runs to the door to go back in! Goddamn it!
 
Sparhawk

Sparhawk

Just a question SR, had you ever been to a Texas Roadhouse before? This is not a knock at you, but a serious question.
 
Gared

Gared

I've had the flu for the past 5 days. Last night I thought I was finally better enough to eat something besides soup or broth. I was not.
 
Shegokigo

Shegokigo

So yeah, problem #37 with dating a Nurse or a Police Officer. Holidays are the best time for YOU (the normal person/job holder) to spend time with the one you want to spend time with. However it is the WORST time for a Nurse or Police Officer to spend time with you. They're overworked and never have a free minute. I saw her once from Friday of last last week to today. Uuuuuugh.
 
M

makare

I was just looking up a recipe for bouillabaisse and in the comments someone was whining because this shouldnt be called bouillabaisse because blah blah. It reminded me of the chili thing. Unless you are sitting down to eat it and you feel you have been seriously misled WHO GIVES A SHIT!?

criminy.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

OK Sir Topham Hat what kind of railroad are you running? You have over 5 derailment every week, your engines goof off all day and you only pull a third of your capacity each trip!
 
LittleSin

LittleSin

He also has the slackest staff ever. The enigineers just leave these sentient engines to go get tea or some shit and then the engines are like "Fuck, I'm going to chase that kite!"

You think they would chain the engines down or something.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

"Oh you want to be a really useful engine do you? Well you can start by STFU and doing what I told you to do!!!!"
 
Mathias

Mathias

I really hate it when a Realtor gives you congratulations when you buy/sell a house after he's just got done ass-fucking with closing costs.
 
CynicismKills

CynicismKills

Pollen count in GA is the highest it's been since 1999, and my sinuses have attempted suicide three times today. I'm going to have to hide the knives.
 
checkeredhat

checkeredhat

CynicismKills said:
Pollen count in GA is the highest it's been since 1999, and my sinuses have attempted suicide three times today. I'm going to have to hide the knives.
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I don't know the numbers, but its already shaping up to be a rough one up here as well. Had the full on spectrum of allergic reactions today without being near any of my usual triggers. Just dust and pollen allergies. Yay, spring is here. Whoop-di- doo.
 
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