Search forums

Forums

Export thread

My very own, genuine manbawww thread.

Dec 16, 2009#1

IronBrig4

I can't believe I'm asking you chumps... haha I kid, I kid.

Basically the past couple of weeks have been problematic with the girl I was dating. She is one of the closest friends I have here in Hawaii, and probably the first one I made. We'd liked each other for a while and started to do a lot of exclusive stuff together. Eventually I asked her out and things were great... until about three weeks ago.

We've both been under a lot of strain with finals and all that. We also officially broke it off last week. It was hard on both of us. I wanted to act like things were normal, so I still visited her office as usual, like nothing had happened. Nothing crazy, just dropping in for about ten or fifteen minutes to chat. Apparently it was the exact opposite of what I should have done. A friend's birthday dinner Friday night was awkward (there was some outside stuff involved in that) and on Saturday she had a bad day and said I should just leave her alone. So I did until today. She had previously invited me to karaoke tonight with a group so we were gonna see each other anyway. It was just a last big event before everybody left to go home for the holidays.

This morning I visited her office to give back a book she had lent me, along with her Christmas present. She then said she couldn't accept the gift. She also said there were some boundaries I needed to respect and we couldn't even make it as friends if I didn't. She said that even though it wasn't my intent, I had made her uncomfortable last week because there was still some awkwardness remaining in the relationship. She reassured me that she really wanted to preserve the friendship and that was actually why she needed more time and space. So I'm not going to karaoke tonight (my decision), she leaves for home tomorrow, and I'm going home on Friday.

So the deal is no calls, no texts, no e-mails, and no Facebook (but we don't have to remove each other from our friend lists). She promised that she'd try to come around and would let me know when things were okay. As for her present, I'm keeping it safe until we're friends again.

No, I'm not blaming her for anything. I'm man enough to admit it was my fault. So I don't want to hear anybody insulting her. But how long of a wait do you think I'm in for? She and I had been friends since August but a couple lousy weeks served to throw a wrench into the works.

Dec 16, 2009#2

Dave

However long it takes...if ever.

DO NOT sit around and pine for the girl. Accept that it's over and move on. If it happens it happens.

Dec 16, 2009#3

strawman

IronBrig4 said:
But how long of a wait do you think I'm in for?

6-8 weeks.

Dec 16, 2009#4

IronBrig4

I do recall asking if it would be months before we started talking again. She then said it probably wouldn't take that long, but still quite a while.

Dec 16, 2009#5

Ravenpoe

Stay the hell away from that girl before she has to file for a restraining order.

At this point, you should probably be prepared to never see her again. That's the sort of mindset you need. Move on, accept that it's over, and maybe if she ever decides to call you again, you can chat with her or whatever, and it'll be cool.

Also, don't give her that present.

Dec 16, 2009#6

Deschain

It sounds like she just suddenly decided you were a terrible person. I don't understand.

Dec 16, 2009#7

Wasabi Poptart

Dave hit the nail on the head. The wait will be as long as long as it takes. Just leave the girl alone for now. If she really is interested in the friendship, then she will contact you again.

Dec 16, 2009#8

Adammon

Deschain said:
It sounds like she just suddenly decided you were a terrible person. I don't understand.

Yeah, I don't quite get it either. How do you go from a relationship to "I can't be around you at all, ever, please leave me alone"

Dec 17, 2009#9

IronBrig4

Deschain said:
It sounds like she just suddenly decided you were a terrible person. I don't understand.

Apparently she's very shy when it comes to relationships and we both got hurt pretty bad when we broke it off. We both have different methods to deal with awkwardness as well. I tried to act like everything was normal and went about the usual routines as if nothing had happened... she needed time and space to think things over and recover. Unfortunately, she hadn't told me that.

Dec 17, 2009#10

Shegokigo

I have no real advice here, I tend to treat ex's like plague carriers.

I'm really impressed you want to pursue a meaningful friendship with her and one day help her plan her wedding. (Just trying to see if that sparks anything for you mentally on if you're doing the right thing)

Dec 17, 2009#11

IronBrig4

Yes, I realize that. I can handle the thought of never dating her again, but we were good friends before this. I do NOT want to lose her as a friend, even if she ends up with some other guy.

Dec 17, 2009#12

bhamv3

There's a reason why a lot of "let's just be friends" breakups don't work out that way. Oftentimes that element of awkwardness always remains.

Give her time and space, and if you two do end up in a good friendship later on, see it as a bonus. Breakups often mean the end of any real contact between the two people.

Dec 17, 2009#13

drawn_inward

I with Sheg on this. My exes might as well be dead. That sounds cruel, but they are my exes for a good damned reason. I would just stay away from her, and avoid situations were you might run into her. If she really want to be friends, she'll let you know.

Dec 17, 2009#14

Cajungal

Adammon;316598][quote=Deschain said:
It sounds like she just suddenly decided you were a terrible person. I don't understand.

Yeah, I don't quite get it either. How do you go from a relationship to "I can't be around you at all, ever, please leave me alone"[/QUOTE]

It's understandable. If it was hard on her, and she needs time, there isn't anything wrong with that. It sounds like it came as a big surprise, and ideally she could have told you a little earlier. Not everyone can do what you did, Iron, and bounce back and try to make everything feel normal. It was nice of you to make the effort and let her know you still want her friendship, and it's good that you're being so understanding, even if it's hard.

I hope y'all can be friends again, but if I had to guess, I'd say it'll probably be a long while til y'all talk again. What Dave said. Good luck.

Dec 17, 2009#15

IronBrig4

I'll just keep the present stashed away on the top shelf of my closet. That way I'll know where it is, but won't have to see it every time I change shirts. And no, I won't spy on her Facebook. Besides, we both restricted each others' accounts so we won't be tempted to respond to status updates. I also made a promise to one of my girl friends that if I look at the lady in question's Facebook more than twice in a week, I'd delete her altogether.

She and I are both in the same program at the university, and we're also part of the same honors society in the department. So we'll probably see a lot of each other whether we like it or not. When we get back from winter break, I'll note how she behaves around me and go from there.

And no, I am NOT gonna sit here and pine for her. I'm marking this friendship as "lost" for the time being.

Dec 17, 2009#16

Docseverin

I am trying to figure out if this is my ex-wife. This is how the shit went down during my divorce, only through e-mail...hrmm interesting.

Dec 17, 2009#17

@Li3n

Your ex-wife told you she needed space from your e-mails?!

Dec 17, 2009#18

Wasabi Poptart

Amorous Vyxen said:
...and don't bother keeping the present, there is a good chance you'll never hear from her again. The present will just be a physical torture device, get rid of it. Sounds harsh, but you'll be better off.

I agree. You shouldn't hold onto the gift. It's hope you're hanging onto, not a present. Return it and buy yourself something. Like a bottle of your favorite alcoholic beverage.

Dec 17, 2009#19

redapples

IronBrig4 said:
No, I'm not blaming her for anything. I'm man enough to admit it was my fault.

Yeah its clear from you post that you behaved like a real douche by visiting her and extending the hand of friendship. If I were you I'd hang my head in shame. No forget that your despicable. Never, never go out in public again! If you must remember burlap is your fashion choice along with a large sign in red letters "I'm a bastard! Hate me!"

Sorry if that's not very sympathetic but dude man up.

Dec 17, 2009#20

KCWM

Take the gift back, if you have the receipt.

Delete her from your facebook. Otherwise, the temptation will always be there.

I'm best friends with my ex-fiancee. When I broke up with her, I told her that I needed space and that I'd be in touch when I'd straightened things out. Of course, when I'm hurt or pissed, it's my first instinct to say the most hateful thing I can.

However, in my experience, when girls say that, it's all part of the mind games they play...or some sick, twisted "test".

Cut your ties and let her come to you.

Dec 17, 2009#21

Shannow

Sneak into her place, and cut a lock of her hair from her while she sleeps. That way you will have her....forever.

Or, take a photo of her, and get a realistic realdoll made in her image. it will be like she never left...

Dec 17, 2009#22

sixpackshaker

It is normal behavior on both of your parts. It is difficult to go from bumping uglies to shaking hands. Be friendly, don't count on being friends. Since you have shared friends, NEVER SAY A CROSS THING ABOUT HER. It will only tarnish your reputation and it will get back to her.

Dec 17, 2009#23

Wasabi Poptart

KCWM said:
However, in my experience, when girls say that, it's all part of the mind games they play...or some sick, twisted "test".

Whenever I've said it, it was usually because I was creeped out by the guy's clingy behavior. Breaking up doesn't normally mean you flip a switch and be best friends who hang out like nothing's happened no matter how amicable the break up is. If things are awkward, it's going to be better off to let things cool off instead of potentially ruining any shred of friendship that's left. Respect her feelings.

Dec 17, 2009#24

D

Dubyamn

Adammon said:
Yeah, I don't quite get it either. How do you go from a relationship to "I can't be around you at all, ever, please leave me alone"

I'm sure that the only people who really understand it are women. I mean as much as I freely admit that every one of my exes was a horrible person to be in a relationship with I still wanted to be friends since started dating them because they were fun to hang out with. So I wanted to hang out with them again after everything died down which never really worked out.

Ironbrig if she needs anything like somebody to take over her class or drive her to the airport make sure to be the first one to say that you'll be able to give her a lift or teach her class or feed her cells (I have no idea what program you're in or what kind of help you can offer one another) whatever she's having problems with. Even if she turns down the help you'll still have made a case for why your a good guy to stay friends with.

Dec 17, 2009#25

Bowielee

Sounds like she was just using the "let's just be friends" as code for "I don't want to see you anymore".

Women don't say this to "play games" they say this because they don't want to hurt your feelings.

Dec 17, 2009#26

Tinwhistler

Amorous Vyxen;316846][quote=Dubyamn said:
Ironbrig if she needs anything like somebody to take over her class or drive her to the airport make sure to be the first one to say that you'll be able to give her a lift or teach her class or feed her cells (I have no idea what program you're in or what kind of help you can offer one another) whatever she's having problems with. Even if she turns down the help you'll still have made a case for why your a good guy to stay friends with.

I'd advice against this. Strongly.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, me too.

Dec 17, 2009#27

Dave

Tinwhistler;316880][quote=Amorous Vyxen;316846][quote=Dubyamn said:
Ironbrig if she needs anything like somebody to take over her class or drive her to the airport make sure to be the first one to say that you'll be able to give her a lift or teach her class or feed her cells (I have no idea what program you're in or what kind of help you can offer one another) whatever she's having problems with. Even if she turns down the help you'll still have made a case for why your a good guy to stay friends with.

I'd advice against this. Strongly.[/quote]

Yeah, me too.[/QUOTE]

Third.

Let. It. Go.

I know you don't want to. I know you're mourning the potential loss of a friend. I grok where you're coming from. But anything you do other than backing away will only make it worse.

Trust the old guy on this.

Dec 17, 2009#28

D

Dubyamn

Amorous Vyxen;316846][quote=Dubyamn said:
Ironbrig if she needs anything like somebody to take over her class or drive her to the airport make sure to be the first one to say that you'll be able to give her a lift or teach her class or feed her cells (I have no idea what program you're in or what kind of help you can offer one another) whatever she's having problems with. Even if she turns down the help you'll still have made a case for why your a good guy to stay friends with.

I'd advice against this. Strongly.[/QUOTE]

*shrugs* You can take it or leave it however you like. But as far as I see it when people don't call, don't txt don't message each other on Facebook, don't talk, take care not to go on the same group activities and aren't there when one another needs a hand they aren't friends and they never will be.

Continue to be a friend Ironbrig neglect kills friendships not a little awkwardness.

Dec 17, 2009#29

Shannow

Dubyamn;316837][quote=Adammon said:
Yeah, I don't quite get it either. How do you go from a relationship to "I can't be around you at all, ever, please leave me alone"

Dec 17, 2009#30

ThatGrinningIdiot!

"Let's just be friends."

"It will take some time."
=
TRANSLATION:
I'm too craven to admit that I no longer care for you, however, I'll maintain a friendly facade in order to pacify my guilty conscience.

SUGGESTION:
Cut your losses and MOVE ON.

Dec 17, 2009#31

strawman

Shannow;316912][quote=Dubyamn;316837][quote=Adammon said:
Yeah, I don't quite get it either. How do you go from a relationship to "I can't be around you at all, ever, please leave me alone"

Dec 17, 2009#32

Shannow

Man, what was the image!?

Dec 17, 2009#33

IronBrig4

Dave said:
I know you don't want to. I know you're mourning the potential loss of a friend. I grok where you're coming from. But anything you do other than backing away will only make it worse.

Trust the old guy on this.

I'll do that. And no, I haven't said anything bad about her because we share practically all the same friends on campus. But that won't stop me from going to the usual social functions when the next semester starts. Last night was an exception because it had just happened.

Dec 17, 2009#34

strawman

Shannow said:
Man, what was the image!?

Dec 17, 2009#35

Shannow

Yeah, thats what I figured, heh.

Dec 17, 2009#36

Dave

No wonder! We can only stand so much dickwad in one thread.

Dec 17, 2009#37

strawman

Dave said:
No wonder! We can only stand so much dickwad in one thread.

Image removed. - Ame

Dec 17, 2009#38

strawman

Amorous Vyxen;316965][quote=stienman;316952][quote=Shannow said:
Man, what was the image!?

It was your avatar - not sure why ame removed it. It's my modus operandi - if someone says something that is perfectly answered with just their avatar, then I'll post their avatar as the response.

Usually gets a chuckle.[/quote]

It was always fine, but I'm assuming you switched proxies because they are all diverting to shady websites now.

---------- Post added at 09:11 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:08 PM ----------

To clarify some:

First of all it uses a https:// protocol, nod a good idea. Second, the domain name itis supposedly hosted on is just a cover for another website, which is tagged as malicious.

I suggest switching to whatever proxy you were using before, that worked fine.[/QUOTE]

Ah. I'm using the same proxy I always use at work, but obviously when I'm copying the links I'm getting the proxified links, not the 'regular' link.

I really don't like this proxy, but it's the only one I know of that work hasn't blocked (yet) - it's a bad php web based proxy.

Thanks for catching that and cleaning up after me!

Dec 17, 2009#39

Shannow

Dave said:
No wonder! We can only stand so much dickwad in one thread.

You know you love me.

Dec 17, 2009#40

Dave

Shannow;316983][quote=Dave said:
No wonder! We can only stand so much dickwad in one thread.

You know you love me.[/QUOTE]

Of course I do.

Dec 17, 2009#41

Shannow

I cant quit you.

Dec 17, 2009#42

Dave

There's no sarcasm. I like Shannow. If I didn't I wouldn't answer his threads and I certainly wouldn't banter with him.

Dec 17, 2009#43

Shannow

Yeah, me and Dave have an understanding.

It is called my penis.

Dec 17, 2009#44

Kitty Sinatra

Does Shannow tell you you're pretty, Dave?

Dec 17, 2009#45

KCWM

Wild, it was my experience. The girls that I've dated that wanted space, and were given space, came back around a week or two later saying that they were just testing me. It's happened quite a bit. Maybe it was the type or age of girl i dated (happened mostly in my late teens, early 20s). I've been chick friends that state they said this to a guy to see just how hard he will try to get her back...used it as a way to figure out how "worth it" they were or something.

I can definitely see a girl saying it because a guy gets too clingy, but given the number of girls I've had do this or say they were doing, across all of the different personality types...it seems far too common.

All anecdotal, so YMMV.

Dec 17, 2009#46

Shannow

Gruebeard said:
Does Shannow tell you you're pretty, Dave?

He likes it better being a dirty little whore. Dont you, Dave.

Dec 17, 2009#47

sixpackshaker

KCWM said:
Wild, it was my experience. The girls that I've dated that wanted space, and were given space, came back around a week or two later saying that they were just testing me. It's happened quite a bit. Maybe it was the type or age of girl i dated (happened mostly in my late teens, early 20s). I've been chick friends that state they said this to a guy to see just how hard he will try to get her back...used it as a way to figure out how "worth it" they were or something.

I can definitely see a girl saying it because a guy gets too clingy, but given the number of girls I've had do this or say they were doing, across all of the different personality types...it seems far too common.

All anecdotal, so YMMV.

It has been my experience that these are the type of people to run away from. If they have to concoct a scenario to test you, that means they do not trust you and never will. Thus, they will continue to crop up more fake drama to push you away.

Dec 17, 2009#48

Dave

Shannow;317012][quote=Gruebeard said:
Does Shannow tell you you're pretty, Dave?

He likes it better being a dirty little whore. Dont you, Dave.[/quote]

I like it because you can lick my balloon knot from the front.

Dec 17, 2009#49

Shannow

It is a gift.

Dec 17, 2009#50

Jay

Cut your ties and let her come to you.

This and find another hobby/woman. Move on. When they start talking about boundaries, don't try to understand them, get OUT.

Dec 17, 2009#51

LordRendar

KCWM said:
they said this to a guy to see just how hard he will try to get her back...used it as a way to figure out how "worth it" they were or something.

I hate girls that do that. My Ex told me that she was pregnant to test if I loved her. After I found out that it was all a hoax i told her to get the fuck out of my apartment.

Anyway, at the OP,

Forget her.

Dec 17, 2009#52

Bowielee

LordRendar;317032][quote=KCWM said:
they said this to a guy to see just how hard he will try to get her back...used it as a way to figure out how "worth it" they were or something.

Dec 17, 2009#53

LordRendar

Bowielee;317041][quote=LordRendar;317032][quote=KCWM said:
they said this to a guy to see just how hard he will try to get her back...used it as a way to figure out how "worth it" they were or something.

Dec 17, 2009#54

IronBrig4

Wow, pretending she was pregnant just to see your reaction? That's awful.

Dec 17, 2009#55

Shannow

I am still at my desk here at work, pointing at my junk.

Dec 17, 2009#56

LordRendar

IronBrig4 said:
Wow, pretending she was pregnant just to see your reaction? That's awful.

I think I fainted when she told me she had a bun in the oven.I was still in college. I already planned on throwing school and getting a job somewhere to support the kid.It was all pretty crazy.

And the Philippines being such a rigid catholic country,I would have had to marry her.

Dec 17, 2009#57

Shegokigo

My brother married the girl he knocked up in High School. Lasted 4yrs and 2 kids. She "realized" after those 4yrs she didn't want to be a "grown up yet" and left him and the kids to go live a "teenager's life".

So yeah, even if a "knock up" happens, you really shouldn't use that as a basis for marriage.

Dec 17, 2009#58

LordRendar

Shegokigo said:
My brother married the girl he knocked up in High School. Lasted 4yrs and 2 kids. She "realized" after those 4yrs she didn't want to be a "grown up yet" and left him and the kids to go live a "teenager's life".

So yeah, even if a "knock up" happens, you really shouldn't use that as a basis for marriage.

Dec 17, 2009#59

Tinwhistler

I think any female who said to me "I was just testing you" would get a response something like "And I was just testing you...you failed. Bye bye now."

Dec 17, 2009#60

ThatGrinningIdiot!

LordRendar;317061][quote=Shegokigo said:
My brother married the girl he knocked up in High School. Lasted 4yrs and 2 kids. She "realized" after those 4yrs she didn't want to be a "grown up yet" and left him and the kids to go live a "teenager's life".

So yeah, even if a "knock up" happens, you really shouldn't use that as a basis for marriage.

Tell that to the Father that would be knocking on my door,with a shotgun in his hand. It's kinda accepted in the Philippines,that if you knock up the girl,you gotta marry her.Otherwise the kid would be a sin in the eyes of god. X.x[/QUOTE]

People who claim to know what an omnipotent force would deem as "sin" are morons.

Dec 17, 2009#61

Chazwozel

...smelly Hawaiians.

Dec 17, 2009#62

Jay

Important Tip : Don't sleep with your EX. You may or may not wake up in agony after she pokes you with her stun gun after forgetting she fell asleep after the dirty deed.

Or sleep on the couch. :bush:

Dec 17, 2009#63

Jake

Does she work at Subway?

Dec 17, 2009#64

Iaculus

BlackCrossCrusader;317082][quote=LordRendar;317061][quote=Shegokigo said:
My brother married the girl he knocked up in High School. Lasted 4yrs and 2 kids. She "realized" after those 4yrs she didn't want to be a "grown up yet" and left him and the kids to go live a "teenager's life".

So yeah, even if a "knock up" happens, you really shouldn't use that as a basis for marriage.

Tell that to the Father that would be knocking on my door,with a shotgun in his hand. It's kinda accepted in the Philippines,that if you knock up the girl,you gotta marry her.Otherwise the kid would be a sin in the eyes of god. X.x[/quote]

People who claim to know what an omnipotent force would deem as "sin" are morons.[/QUOTE]

Morons with shotguns. The last bit is important.

Dec 17, 2009#65

IronBrig4

Jake said:
Does she work at Subway?

No. Why? Does she remind you of somebody you know?

Dec 17, 2009#66

Kitty Sinatra

As I understand it, someone else here was kinda stalkerish with a gal who worked at Subway.,

Dec 17, 2009#67

SpecialKO

Just don't do it, dude. If she wants to be friends, she'll come to you.

And don't do any major favors she may ask for. She may be "testing" you, or hanging on to you "just in case", or it may just be her way of making sure you guys keep contact and stay friends without making her feel confused, but in the end, it will bring everything to a bad end that much faster.

Dec 17, 2009#68

Jake

IronBrig4;317184][quote=Jake said:
Does she work at Subway?

No. Why? Does she remind you of somebody you know?[/QUOTE]
In a way...

Dec 17, 2009#69

JCM

IronBrig4 said:
I can't believe I'm asking you chumps... haha I kid, I kid.

Basically the past couple of weeks have been problematic with the girl I was dating. She is one of the closest friends I have here in Hawaii, and probably the first one I made. We'd liked each other for a while and started to do a lot of exclusive stuff together. Eventually I asked her out and things were great... until about three weeks ago.

We've both been under a lot of strain with finals and all that. We also officially broke it off last week. It was hard on both of us. I wanted to act like things were normal, so I still visited her office as usual, like nothing had happened. Nothing crazy, just dropping in for about ten or fifteen minutes to chat. Apparently it was the exact opposite of what I should have done. A friend's birthday dinner Friday night was awkward (there was some outside stuff involved in that) and on Saturday she had a bad day and said I should just leave her alone. So I did until today. She had previously invited me to karaoke tonight with a group so we were gonna see each other anyway. It was just a last big event before everybody left to go home for the holidays.

This morning I visited her office to give back a book she had lent me, along with her Christmas present. She then said she couldn't accept the gift. She also said there were some boundaries I needed to respect and we couldn't even make it as friends if I didn't. She said that even though it wasn't my intent, I had made her uncomfortable last week because there was still some awkwardness remaining in the relationship. She reassured me that she really wanted to preserve the friendship and that was actually why she needed more time and space. So I'm not going to karaoke tonight (my decision), she leaves for home tomorrow, and I'm going home on Friday.

So the deal is no calls, no texts, no e-mails, and no Facebook (but we don't have to remove each other from our friend lists). She promised that she'd try to come around and would let me know when things were okay. As for her present, I'm keeping it safe until we're friends again.

No, I'm not blaming her for anything. I'm man enough to admit it was my fault. So I don't want to hear anybody insulting her. But how long of a wait do you think I'm in for? She and I had been friends since August but a couple lousy weeks served to throw a wrench into the works.

Move on, enjoy life and whatever you do, dont play the manbawing victim.

If she wants you, she'll come back, if not, you wont have wasted your life.

Dec 17, 2009#70

Allen, who is Quiet

Jake said:
Does she work at Subway?

Dec 17, 2009#71

ThatGrinningIdiot!

I don't get the joke Allen. :confused:

Is Jake making a reference to the time TNG - TheNeonGrue - went semi-stalker on some girl that worked at a restaurant?

Dec 17, 2009#72

Allen, who is Quiet

Yes.

Dec 18, 2009#73

Iaculus

Call her at three in the morning and breathe heavily down the phone until she hangs up.

Drives the ladies wild.

Dec 18, 2009#74

Chazwozel

There's only one solution to this:

Dec 18, 2009#75

@Li3n

Is Jake making a reference to the time TNG - TheNeonGrue - went semi-stalker on some girl that worked at a restaurant?

You know, it doesn't actually count unless he went to Subway at least twice over it...

LordRendar;317055][quote=IronBrig4 said:
Wow, pretending she was pregnant just to see your reaction? That's awful.

Dec 18, 2009#76

Jake

Chazwozel said:
There's only one solution to this:

This will never, ever stop being funny. I'm calling it.

Dec 21, 2009#77

IronBrig4

Just FYI, she dropped me as a friend on Facebook a little while ago. Truth be told, it doesn't feel too bad. At least I can say I tried. This could mean she just doesn't want either of us to be tempted to chat, she really wants more space, or she's completely throwing away the friendship. Either way, we won't see each other until the break's over.

Dec 21, 2009#78

Dave

The Halforums Hivemind is wise. I'm sorry, man.

Dec 21, 2009#79

Math242

Your friendship is over. It died out the day you broke up and you need to get over it.

Don't fool yourself that it will be any different when winterbreak's over. she'll eventually see new people and you'll have to be ready for that.

Dec 21, 2009#80

IronBrig4

I'm getting over it, but it just doesn't seem right that I did exactly what was required of me and yet this still happened. I didn't call, text, chat, or message her at all. Our only indirect contact came when we were commenting on shared friends' statuses. Even then we didn't address each other. Not only did she take me off her friend list, she completely blocked me as well. I think that's just rude.

I'll be fine. Still sucks, though.

Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus? I know it will happen because we spend a lot of time in the offices and library.

Dec 21, 2009#81

strawman

IronBrig4 said:
Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus? I know it will happen because we spend a lot of time in the offices and library.

Pretend she doesn't exist.

But honestly, does it matter? She's no more than a stranger now - that's the position she's clearly put your relationship in.

Ignore her and her overreactions.

Dec 21, 2009#82

Adammon

IronBrig4 said:
Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus?

Back up and run over her again.

Dec 21, 2009#83

D

Dubyamn

IronBrig4 said:
I'm getting over it, but it just doesn't seem right that I did exactly what was required of me and yet this still happened. I didn't call, text, chat, or message her at all. Our only indirect contact came when we were commenting on shared friends' statuses. Even then we didn't address each other. Not only did she take me off her friend list, she completely blocked me as well. I think that's just rude.

I'll be fine. Still sucks, though.

Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus? I know it will happen because we spend a lot of time in the offices and library.

Nod and a wave. The classic acknowledgment of a nonfriend who you wish no particular harm towards.

Dec 21, 2009#84

Bowielee

Dubyamn;318918][quote=IronBrig4 said:
I'm getting over it, but it just doesn't seem right that I did exactly what was required of me and yet this still happened. I didn't call, text, chat, or message her at all. Our only indirect contact came when we were commenting on shared friends' statuses. Even then we didn't address each other. Not only did she take me off her friend list, she completely blocked me as well. I think that's just rude.

I'll be fine. Still sucks, though.

Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus? I know it will happen because we spend a lot of time in the offices and library.

Nod and a wave. The classic acknowledgment of a nonfriend who you wish no particular harm towards.[/QUOTE]

That's pretty much my reaction towards my only Ex who I actually still like. I just give the hi sign and move on. If he's interested in talking, it's up to him to strike up the conversation.

Course, I did the exact OPPOSITE of what we're telling BigIron to do with that guy and I think I may have scarred him for life against relationships.

Not one of my better years as a human being in general.

Dec 21, 2009#85

Null

Tell her that just got some test results back, and, well, she may want to talk to her doctor. Then go on about your merry way.

Dec 22, 2009#86

Math242

say hi and move on. or do what LB says. FOR THE LULZ

Dec 22, 2009#87

Tinwhistler

Lying Bastard said:
Tell her that just got some test results back, and, well, she may want to talk to her doctor. Then go on about your merry way.

You're in trouble if she replies back "Oh, I was wondering when you were going to find out. I meant to tell you..."

Dec 22, 2009#88

JCM

Tinwhistler;319229][quote=Lying Bastard said:
Tell her that just got some test results back, and, well, she may want to talk to her doctor. Then go on about your merry way.

You're in trouble if she replies back "Oh, I was wondering when you were going to find out. I meant to tell you..."[/QUOTE]

Dec 22, 2009#89

Kitty Sinatra

Adammon;318881][quote=IronBrig4 said:
Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus?

Back up and run over her again.[/QUOTE]

Make her jealous: Grab the nearest, hottest gal and kiss her passionately.

Dec 22, 2009#90

Dieb

Gruebeard;319247][quote=Adammon;318881][quote=IronBrig4 said:
Btw, what should I do when I bump into her on campus?

Back up and run over her again.[/QUOTE]

Make her jealous: Grab the nearest, hottest gal and kiss her passionately.[/QUOTE]
Then, when that pretty girl slaps you, you will have given your ex the best gift of all: the gift of laughter.

Dec 22, 2009#91

Null

And when that pretty girl charges you with sexual assault, you can subpeona her as a character witness. Which you'll probably think is a good idea.

Dec 22, 2009#92

Hailey Knight

This thread doesn't deserve this laughter.

Dec 22, 2009#93

Null

escushion said:
This thread doesn't deserve this laughter.

But you can't spell slaughter without 'laughter'.

Or an 's'.

Dec 23, 2009#94

Shannow

or Aught?

Dec 23, 2009#95

IronBrig4

There's another matter that deserves consideration. She and I share practically all the same friends on campus. How can I organize group activities (Super Bowl party, karaoke night, etc.) without causing more trouble? If I invite her, I can be accused of invading her space again. If I don't, then I can be accused of callousness instead.

And this isn't just a hypothetical situation. It WILL happen sooner or later as long as we're both still part of the same circle of friends.

Dec 23, 2009#96

Tinwhistler

(shrug) she clearly wants nothing to do with you. Don't look for reasons to interact with her again. If you end up at the same parties, fine, whatever, but dude, leave her alone. I don't really think you have to worry about being labeled callous.

Dec 23, 2009#97

Docseverin

Kill her...it's the only way to be sure.

Dec 23, 2009#98

Dieb

Tinwhistler said:
(shrug) she clearly wants nothing to do with you. Don't look for reasons to interact with her again. If you end up at the same parties, fine, whatever, but dude, leave her alone. I don't really think you have to worry about being labeled callous.

^This

Jan 11, 2010#99

IronBrig4

A bit of an update here. The semester just started today. Our stuff is in the same building so we crossed paths on two occasions. I didn't say a word and simply walked on. Not in a huff or anything like that; I just walked by. I didn't notice what her reaction was, but she didn't say anything either. I was not prepared to see her again, and she probably felt the same way (or so I heard from some mutual friends).

No, I haven't made any attempts to interact with her. I know those backfire.

Jan 11, 2010#100

ThatGrinningIdiot!

Keep ignoring her.

Forums