Random Video Game Crap

After binging on all the bullshittery videos on Youtube, now everything I read is in SovietWomble's voice. And if I ever read something where a second voice is necessary (eg, someone's replying) then it's in Cyanide's voice.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Surely I can't be the only person who's ever noticed that the main theme from Saints Row 3 sounds almost exactly like Morning Dew by Bad Lip Reading.





"Tonight, after wine, Imma knock you in the head... and then... GRANDE TACO."
 
Thanks to some home renovation and my son deciding to see what would happen should he run downhill at full speed against a wall (spoiler: medical and dentist bills happen), I put off getting myself an Xbox one until February, moving up from a PS3 where I only played Ps exclusives, Fallout, Bioshock, Assassin's Creed, Skyrim and GTA.

Then I got an X360 as a gift from a student, and now feel the need to preview the Microsoft side of games, what would you guys suggest? Other than soccer games, damn thing came with every FIFA and PES under the sun.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Thanks to some home renovation and my son deciding to see what would happen should he run downhill at full speed against a wall (spoiler: medical and dentist bills happen), I put off getting myself an Xbox one until February, moving up from a PS3 where I only played Ps exclusives, Fallout, Bioshock, Assassin's Creed, Skyrim and GTA.

Then I got an X360 as a gift from a student, and now feel the need to preview the Microsoft side of games, what would you guys suggest? Other than soccer games, damn thing came with every FIFA and PES under the sun.
DOA? Hrmm... uh... Red Dead Redemption... Not sure what else. I haven't played a console game in a while, so my repertoire is limited to console games I was disappointed didn't get a PC port.
 
Steam has an awards thing with its current sale where people can nominate games for each of the categories.

One option is to create your own award and nominate a game.

I'm seeing some people voting for either Half-Life 2 or Episode 2 for "Game That Needs a Sequel!"

...I did it. I want Half-Life 3, dammit.
 
DOA? Hrmm... uh... Red Dead Redemption... Not sure what else. I haven't played a console game in a while, so my repertoire is limited to console games I was disappointed didn't get a PC port.
I remember the praise it got, but never got around to it. Thanks.
 
I just bought a game solely because Frank Klepaki (the guy who did all the Command and Conquer music) did the soundtrack. Also, it's made by the remnants of Westwood Studios.

I bought an RTS called Grey Goo.
 
I just bought a game solely because Frank Klepaki (the guy who did all the Command and Conquer music) did the soundtrack. Also, it's made by the remnants of Westwood Studios.

I bought an RTS called Grey Goo.
Hey, let me know how that is. I couldn't justify a launch buy, and I've heard very mixed reviews of it.
 
What did they do now
I don't think there needs to be one specific thing; they're generally fucked in the head.

In this case, they appear to be discontinuing Vita memory cards, which means I can't sit on the sideline hoping for a good deal on getting a bigger one.

But they'll fuck up something else soon. It's been a while since they were last hacked; they're due for another probably around Christmas. Hopefully they didn't leave all their passwords in a word file named passwords this time. Maybe they put it in a locked .zip file, the password for which is "password."
 
I don't think there needs to be one specific thing; they're generally fucked in the head.

In this case, they appear to be discontinuing Vita memory cards, which means I can't sit on the sideline hoping for a good deal on getting a bigger one.

But they'll fuck up something else soon. It's been a while since they were last hacked; they're due for another probably around Christmas. Hopefully they didn't leave all their passwords in a word file named passwords this time. Maybe they put it in a locked .zip file, the password for which is "password."
The Vita is pretty much dead, so this isn't very surprising. You can still blame Sony for this, it's a great little machine that they never properly supported, but it's already drawn its last breath.
 
The Vita is pretty much dead, so this isn't very surprising. You can still blame Sony for this, it's a great little machine that they never properly supported, but it's already drawn its last breath.
There's still good stuff being released for it, but receiving pretty much zero help from Sony and most of it's been released on other systems. I was fine with the tiny memory card when this was just a Persona 4: Dancing All Night and PS1 machine, but there's other stuff I have now that I'd like to be able to play. I just didn't realize to what extent Sony was pulling the plug.
 
Then I got an X360 as a gift from a student, and now feel the need to preview the Microsoft side of games, what would you guys suggest? Other than soccer games, damn thing came with every FIFA and PES under the sun.
If you like shooters, then Halo. You'd have Halo 3, Reach, ODST, and 4 to pick from. Otherwise, The Orange Box comes with Half-Life 2, Portal, and Team Fortress 2. If you are a shooter fan and haven't played those by now, what are you waiting for?

Fighting games, Dead or Alive is a good series. DOA 5 Last Round is recommended. As is the Soul Calibur series. 4 is better than 5, but you may be able to find both for cheap currently. Street Fighter 4 is also a solid bet. 5 is out now for PS4 & XBone so probably some decent deals there.

Mass Effect series for a pretty good sci-fi RPG experience. Ending of 3 notwithstanding. Dragon Age for your sword and sorcery RPG needs. 1 is better than 2, to be sure.

Most of these are available on the other consoles as well. There's not many I can point to that are 360 exclusives other than Halo. Maybe Forza if you like racing games? I have not played any of them so can't say which one is best. Wikipedia says Ninja Gaiden II was an exclusive and it is a good game and very hard. But at the same time, PS3 had Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 which was essentially the same game, but with a few more features. So not really exclusive.
 
Cross gets a lot of hate, but really it's not a bad game at all, imo.

Sure, Trigger does a lot of things better, but Cross can stand on its own legs pretty well.
 
Cross gets a lot of hate, but really it's not a bad game at all, imo.

Sure, Trigger does a lot of things better, but Cross can stand on its own legs pretty well.
I gave it an honest try. Played about 30 minutes of it but I just couldn't get into it. I remember the combat was terrible (something colour related or something?) and the story made no sense.

It's a shame because I love any kind of story involving alternate universes.
 
To be fair, if you judged Trigger's story off the first 30 minutes you'd have no idea what's really going on either. Goofing off at the fair? Suddenly time-travel? Frog-man?

Either way, if the game's not up your alley I get it. The elemental combat thing takes some getting used to and doesn't feel great till your party's a little bigger.
 
The thing is, Chrono Trigger starts off with a slice of relatively normal life that takes a sudden and dramatic turn, that draws you into the adventure. "Oh, can't wait to see what happens next, there's been a lot to do so far."

Chrono Cross just made me say "What the fuck is this?" for the 20 minutes I played it.
 
Chrono Cross is legit great, it just has a wonky first 30 mins/hour. Most of it's hate is tied to it being a Chrono Trigger sequel that really only shoehorns in a few elements from the first game. They should have tried harder with THAT, but otherwise it's great.

And yeah, the magic system is a bit odd: you have 6 elements and a field that changes alignment to those elements based on what's being used in the battle. A lot of later battles revolve around making sure the field isn't turned a solid color by bosses, who have big fuck off attacks they can cast during a mono-colored field.
 
See, the first half hour or hour of a game is supposed to make you go, "Yeah, I want to see where this is going, show me more," not, "What the fuck is this shit and why haven't I sent it back to Gamefly yet?"
 

GasBandit

Staff member
See, the first half hour or hour of a game is supposed to make you go, "Yeah, I want to see where this is going, show me more," not, "What the fuck is this shit and why haven't I sent it back to Gamefly yet?"
It's the 90s school of thought for JRPGs. "Yeah, this Final Fantasy sequel doesn't really start to get good until the second (or third) disc."
 
It's the 90s school of thought for JRPGs. "Yeah, this Final Fantasy sequel doesn't really start to get good until the second (or third) disc."
It's just a general Square Enix thing, I think.

Chrono Trigger: 2-3 hours for the Time Travel plot to REALLY get started (once your in the future and learn the fate of the world)
Kingdom Hearts: 2 Hours to get off the Island and out of Traverse Town
Kingdom Hearts 2: -5- Hours to get out of Twilight Town
Final Fantasy 13: 20+ god damn hours
 

GasBandit

Staff member
It's just a general Square Enix thing, I think.

Chrono Trigger: 2-3 hours for the Time Travel plot to REALLY get started (once your in the future and learn the fate of the world)
Kingdom Hearts: 2 Hours to get off the Island and out of Traverse Town
Kingdom Hearts 2: -5- Hours to get out of Twilight Town
Final Fantasy 13: 20+ god damn hours
Yeah, but they were pretty much the only game in town, so to speak, for JRPGs with US releases until the mid 2000s, unless you count ones that required mosaic censoring :megusta:
 
Gonna find out how FF15 stacks up at midnight.
It looks like you spend the game playing as a J-Pop boy band-meets Entourage-meets JRPG bullshit.

Seriously, though, time how long the game makes you push the fancy car.[DOUBLEPOST=1480368191,1480367964][/DOUBLEPOST]
It's the 90s school of thought for JRPGs. "Yeah, this Final Fantasy sequel doesn't really start to get good until the second (or third) disc."
Confession: I never got past the first disc of FFVIII, never played 9, still haven't finished X or X-2 or XII.

There comes a point in a lot of JRPGs where you can more or less finish the game at will, but there are still a shitload of sidequests to do. And doing the sidequests is way, way harder than the main quest - in fact, frequently to the level of bullshit. To the point where it becomes a chore to play because all you're doing is grinding for an item or piece of equipment or rare drop for a stupid ass sidequest or trying to level up because the secret dungeon is like 10x harder than the entire rest of the game.

That is the point where I stop playing.
 
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