[Thread Game] Terrible Video Game Descriptions (MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS)

BananaHands

Staff member
Give the vaguest description of a video game possible. See if anyone can guess it.

First up?
  • Get promised a cake.
  • Jump in paintings.
  • Throw a dinosaur.
  • Race a penguin.
  • Chase a rabbit in a basement.
  • Throw a dinosaur.
  • Run up a staircase forever.
  • Goddamn, 70? Really?
  • Run up the staircase.
  • Throw a dinosaur.
  • Get promised a cake.
 

BananaHands

Staff member
That is Super Mario 64. I actually guess it from the first hint.


You are correct![DOUBLEPOST=1357922348][/DOUBLEPOST]Next one:
  • Famous ancestor.
  • Get interviewed by a journalist.
  • PIRATES!
  • South America.
  • NAZIS!
  • JETSKI!
  • ZOMBIES!
  • ZOMBIE NAZIS!
  • Kiss journalist.
 
• Main character is a mute ginger
• Best friend is a nerd
• Crazy blonde gets main character caught up in crazy road trip.
• Makes friends along the way with: a slippery fellow; a dude who is totally metal; a chick who is a complete neanderthal; and a goth guy with family issues.
 
Chrono Trigger dudicals.

- Dude gets a suit way more expensive than he could ever afford.
- Best friend has a real Jekyll and Hyde issue
- Has to fight crazy villains who often have a fondness for Modest Petrovich Mussorgsky
 
-Zip through space
-Now I'm faster!
-*boom*
-Whoops! Too fast!
-Wavy lasers? Hmm...twin-linked lasers? HMM...charging exploding death lasers? YES.
- 4 floating orange orbs of death.
- *FLASH* *Everything dies*
-Shoot a mayor




:megusta:
-Shoot a whole damned parade of mayors
-Brains
-VICTORY
 

BananaHands

Staff member
-Zip through space
-Now I'm faster!
-*boom*
-Whoops! Too fast!
-Wavy lasers? Hmm...twin-linked lasers? HMM...charging exploding death lasers? YES.
- 4 floating orange orbs of death.
- *FLASH* *Everything dies*
-Shoot a mayor




:megusta:
-Shoot a whole damned parade of mayors
-Brains
-VICTORY
Gladius??
 

BananaHands

Staff member
  • have eating disorder
  • be a haunted individual
  • take a bunch of pills
  • resort to a diet of fruit and vegetables
  • face your ghosts head on
 
I thought that one, but having never beat it, I didn't understand the mayor part
As a kid, I remember reading the instruction manual and being surprised the bosses were called mayors.

By the way, anyone else miss having wonderful, interesting game manual things to read? I remember getting a game as a kid, getting into the car and ripping into the manual to psyche myself up for when I got home.
 
As a kid, I remember reading the instruction manual and being surprised the bosses were called mayors.

By the way, anyone else miss having wonderful, interesting game manual things to read? I remember getting a game as a kid, getting into the car and ripping into the manual to psyche myself up for when I got home.
Yeah, now all you get is an ad for another game, and maybe 3 days of live time or some shit..

I loved getting maps, backstory, character info, all that fun stuff
 

BananaHands

Staff member
Chrono Trigger dudicals.

- Dude gets a suit way more expensive than he could ever afford.
- Best friend has a real Jekyll and Hyde issue
- Has to fight crazy villains who often have a fondness for Modest Petrovich Mussorgsky
I still have no idea what this could be...
 

figmentPez

Staff member
  • Work as a travel agent
  • Work as a Spy
  • Assistant Mechanic
  • Mop Floors
  • Run a Casino
  • Swab Decks
  • Captain a Ship
  • Operate Heavy Machinery
  • Travel by Dog Sled
  • Rocket Scientist
  • Vegas-style Stage Show
  • Revolutionary / Assassin
I think I might have missed a few, but that should be enough.
 
  • Work as a travel agent
  • Work as a Spy
  • Assistant Mechanic
  • Mop Floors
  • Run a Casino
  • Swab Decks
  • Captain a Ship
  • Operate Heavy Machinery
  • Travel by Dog Sled
  • Rocket Scientist
  • Vegas-style Stage Show
  • Revolutionary / Assassin
I think I might have missed a few, but that should be enough.

Hitman: Blood Money?
 

BananaHands

Staff member
  • Attempt to save princess from bad guy.
  • Help save her from an evil knight.
  • Stand outside her window.
  • Frighten her.
  • Chase her down.
  • She gets saved by brave knight.
  • Attempt to save princess from bad guy.
 

figmentPez

Staff member
Hitman: Blood Money?
Nope. The first item is actually enough to solve it, but I like the crazy list.[DOUBLEPOST=1358014916][/DOUBLEPOST]
  • Attempt to save princess from bad guy.
  • Help save her from an evil knight.
  • Stand outside her window.
  • Frighten her.
  • Chase her down.
  • She gets saved by brave knight.
  • Attempt to save princess from bad guy.
At first I thought this might be a Legend of Zelda game, but I can't think of one that actually fits.
 
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