This boredom is a killer.
I feel like today will never end.
Am I trapped in some kind of hell? Have I offended the Lord?
I feel like today will never end.
Am I trapped in some kind of hell? Have I offended the Lord?
The Random Crap Thread 2: It Hits the Fan.
- Thread starter North_Ranger
- Start date
GasBandit
Staff member
Yes, I'm rather fed up with you and your nonsense.
fade
Staff member
You're God? In that case, I have to ask. Do you really care if I masturbate? If so, is there an acceptable amount, or is it all bad?
GasBandit
Staff member
I want you to masturbate til your fingers bleed, then tape them up and continue.
Unless you're a furry. Then you know what you must do.
Not to question Your Magnificence, but would fingers really be the first thing to bleed in that situation?
GasBandit
Staff member
Irrelevant. Thou shalt only tape up thy fingers.
fade
Staff member
Okay, but I'd really rather masturbate my penis.
So how was everyone's Memorial day? Mine was awesome, my family always brings the BEST food, and my dad's ribs were TO DIE for. I just wish that my cousin would've stopped saying "Balling so hard" through-out the night. I love the guy, but he is MAD intense, imagine my crazyness but multiplied by at least a cube.
Stuck a bottle of Vodka into a Watermelon.Like real deep into it. I feel dirty.
Not as dirty as you will feel in the morning... after eating half a hooch soaked melon.
Reminds me of when I was a kid, and they'd serve a PLETHORA of vodka shots. I would ask "Why can't I have jello?" And 11 year later I KNOWS WHY!
Over the years I've grown to like my father's family parties more since they are MAD into drinking, while my mother's family parties were geared extremely towards the younger relatives. Part of growing up I guess.
They should have done what my family did, and have alternative, non-alcoholic jello shots to serve to the kids, so they didn't feel left out and didn't know what was going on.
At least until the adults started complaining that there was no booze in their shots.
Man, Little Billy was a mean drunk.
Im serving Jello shots too.Tonight will be fuuuuun.
Or better Watermelons.
TMI, but experience tells me that, at least with my masturbation technique, it's the frenulum that starts bleeding first, followed by friction burns on the side of the penis.
....What? I was frustrated and depressed. Don't judge me.
Too late, sorry.Don't judge me.
TIL what a frenulum is.TMI, but experience tells me that, at least with my masturbation technique, it's the frenulum that starts bleeding first, followed by friction burns on the side of the penis.
....What? I was frustrated and depressed. Don't judge me.
GasBandit did not say stop when you start to bleed. He said stop when your hands do...TMI, but experience tells me that, at least with my masturbation technique, it's the frenulum that starts bleeding first, followed by friction burns on the side of the penis.
....What? I was frustrated and depressed. Don't judge me.
Yeah I'm considering unfollowing it myself, not for that though(though yes that was smug). Mostly because after Ethan Mike and Amber left if feels like its lost a bit of the spark it once had. Malaya's mean childish nature isn't near the jerk level of Mike, Ken is boring, and while I like Lucy at first I feel like she's one of those characters who is suppose to represent the good nerd and it results in her not getting many funny lines. I don't know, I'll give it a few more months.
My friend on Facebook posted...
"10 years ago today I did one of the best things I have ever done in my life!!!! Happy Anniversary"
His wife replied...
"yea....11years babe. 2002."
"10 years ago today I did one of the best things I have ever done in my life!!!! Happy Anniversary"
His wife replied...
"yea....11years babe. 2002."
Yeah, but 2003 is when he stopped regretting it.
I thought it was the first anniversary sex he liked so much.
Caller: Hello, I'm calling about an opinion survey for the blah blah blah...
Me: I'm sorry, I'm just heading out the door (total lie).
Caller: I see, when would be a good time to call back?
Me: Oh, how about 2017?
Caller: Thank you. Good bye.
If they call back 4 years from today, I'll be impressed.
Me: I'm sorry, I'm just heading out the door (total lie).
Caller: I see, when would be a good time to call back?
Me: Oh, how about 2017?
Caller: Thank you. Good bye.
If they call back 4 years from today, I'll be impressed.
It feels like many independent web celebrities act like jerks on Twitter. Rather than cultivating their following, it's a place to type every gripe that occurs to them.
I think that's where you get to really find out what someone's like. Well, if they're not tactful about what they put on there. I find some of the big comic book creators like Greg Rucka, Mark Waid, and Kurt Busiek are all incredibly nice on there. Even guys like Chris Sims and maybe MovieBob to a lesser extent are pretty solid guys on there.
I'm betting you will probably get a call at about a quarter after eight o'clock tonight.
--Patrick
If I'd said "twenty seventeen" rather than "two thousand seventeen," then I'd agree with you.
I saw a snake today! It was trying to hide behind my fence-SO CUTE!
