Sounds like someone doesn't know the difference between "represent" and "warrant (v.t.)."
--Patrick
The Random Crap Thread 2: It Hits the Fan.
- Thread starter North_Ranger
- Start date
--Patrick
Dave
Staff member
One of the things I am doing for my health is exercising during my lunch. Nothing too bad - we play ping pong from 11 to about 12:15. Good for reflexes and cardio. Today there were four of us playing and a student came wandering in. We've seen him before and asked if he wanted to play. He said no but was enjoying watching us. After he left I noticed that my boss's wallet was on the floor. Uh oh. So I tell him to check quick and sure enough, one of his credit cards was missing. I rushed out & stopped the guy while my boss went to the guard room - which just happened to be two doors down from the rec room. While herding him to the guard shack, the dude threw something into the recycle bin. And when we called him on it, he went in and threw it under one of the machines - which the boss also saw him do. Turns out the guys fully confessed once the cops got there and he was caught on video.
Now comes the fun part - he's a scholarship basketball player at our school and there was pressure to NOT charge him, but my boss is pressing charges. So he'll probably not see any jail time since he never got to USE the card (although I did tell my boss to cancel the card since he could have taken pictures of the back & front to sell or use online), but he's going to lose his scholarship and will possibly be expelled. But he also will be ineligible to play basketball here, so he'd be paying for school himself now anyway.
How fucking dumb can you be? You get a free ride to go to school and you throw it all away. Why? Such a fucking waste.
Now comes the fun part - he's a scholarship basketball player at our school and there was pressure to NOT charge him, but my boss is pressing charges. So he'll probably not see any jail time since he never got to USE the card (although I did tell my boss to cancel the card since he could have taken pictures of the back & front to sell or use online), but he's going to lose his scholarship and will possibly be expelled. But he also will be ineligible to play basketball here, so he'd be paying for school himself now anyway.
How fucking dumb can you be? You get a free ride to go to school and you throw it all away. Why? Such a fucking waste.
In the basement!
In a convenience store bath room!
I'm having trouble getting the image off of Facebook, but apparently a certain Hub released statistics on the most searched-for terms in the U.S. by state.
Not surprisingly, "lesbian" is the most popular in 30 states. I'm amused that some people are taking this to mean there are more women on the site than thought, while others are taking it to mean "America less gay than I thought." ???
In any case, the other big ones were ... "stepsister" and "stepmom" and "ebony". Hooboy!
I think that was it--except Tennessee had "cartoons." I propose Tennessee from now on be known as the hentai state.
Not surprisingly, "lesbian" is the most popular in 30 states. I'm amused that some people are taking this to mean there are more women on the site than thought, while others are taking it to mean "America less gay than I thought." ???
In any case, the other big ones were ... "stepsister" and "stepmom" and "ebony". Hooboy!
I think that was it--except Tennessee had "cartoons." I propose Tennessee from now on be known as the hentai state.
Each time I see those vending machines in the men's restroom... I walk out and tell the clerk, "The bubble gum in that machine in there tastes like rubber."
fade
Staff member
I'm having lately a--what do they call it?--a moment of clarity. I'm starting to realize my life is too filled with regret and cynicism. These have become things I almost take pride in, and I realize I need to stop. This is all me, and I'm letting it leak onto other people. I have a choice--regret decisions I made that cannot be changed in the past, or move on. Sometimes, these regrets grow from silly small things. For example I deeply regret giving up my professorship. I'm not 100% sure even why I did it. But even today I throw in "I used to be a professor" when I talk professionally. I should let all this past stuff go and live now.
Even a botanist can fix a hole in a boat.
I do believe Nebraska's indeed one step away from Hell.
Is that Rhode Island that has that one lovely search all to themselves?
GasBandit
Staff member
It is indeed. Rhode Islanders are apparently Milfhunters.
I think so.
Also, there appear to be other states with cartoon as their main thing. Sorry, Tennessee.
For some reason Alaska's "step mom" looks funnier than the others; like it's joyous about this. It shouldn't be.
Time for Halforums to secede.
How can we fix this for you?
Albums include:
The hungriest time
Brunch
I forgot it's trash day
Better than Monday, but only just
Unending meeting
Bare bones of a convo with my pal today.
Friend: Yo dude if two dudes in a van come by your house-DON'T let them in!
Me: What the FUCK man? WHAT TWO GUYS?! WHO ARE THEY?
Friend: I don't know, I just heard there were guys like that.
Me:...not ...two guys you know specifically.
Friend: No.
Me:Your phraseology needs work.
Seriously though he's a good egg.
Friend: Yo dude if two dudes in a van come by your house-DON'T let them in!
Me: What the FUCK man? WHAT TWO GUYS?! WHO ARE THEY?
Friend: I don't know, I just heard there were guys like that.
Me:...not ...two guys you know specifically.
Friend: No.
Me:Your phraseology needs work.
Seriously though he's a good egg.
0x2C or not 0x2C, that is the question.
Happy birthday, I presume! If so, you're approximately 10% older than me. Share your wisdom, what new thing have you learned in the last four years that I would benefit from?
It ain't my birthday. That was sports related.
Wisdom:
Don't drink booze in bed.
Do it now! I'll probably kill you in the morning.
Kraft does not make cheese.
Your bathroom scale is accurate to 2.2 lbs, not 0.2.
Read a book.
Nobody gives a shit about what you are going to do.
Dave
Staff member
Do you like my thinly veiled sarcasm? He was almost reasonable this time. I think he's all out of mouth froth.
This is great stuff. I'm having vision problems, though, and I find learning new things is better if I repeat what I've learned, so can you check my work in case my eyes are misleading me?
Don't drink cheese.
Do it now, not when you're 2.2lb heavier.
Kraft does not make books.
Your bathroom scale cares about what you are going to do.
Read booze in bed.
Nobody will kill you in the morning.
Weasels in the pants is a good thing.
Cajungal
Staff member
