Dave

Staff member
Second leg done. In Tooelle, Utah sitting in our hotel. Came this way to visit Caleb, a friend of mine from Twitch. Good food, good conversation, I sang “Rainbow Connection” for Twitch Sings in the voice of Kermit the Frog. You know, the usual stuff.

Now the wife is in the shower. Tomorrow starts early because we found out the visitor’s center at the base closes 5 hours earlier than posted. So our time padding is now gone.
 
I've discovered a personal ear-worm eraser. It's a short, continually repeating playlist of ear-worms that are so individually catchy that you can't remember the previous song's catchiness while listening the current song. I've been listening to it nonstop on repeat for more than two days now, and I can't remember any of the songs, nor am I sick of any of the songs, and I enjoy each one each time it plays. This is fucking weird. The list, in case anyone is curious:

1. Volbeat - Battleship Chains
2. Outkast - Hey Ya!
3. The Chicks - March, March
4. The Dead South - In Hell I'll Be in Good Company
5. Modest Mouse - The Ground Walks, with Time in a Box
6. The White Stripes - Icky Thump

The playlist doesn't make sense, just like the world right now.
It makes even less sense when you take out Outkast and stick Old Town Road (the original cut, no remix, no billy ray) to the end.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
TFW your Roomba's ass-canister falls off halfway through its rounds so it's just spent 45 minutes making a lot of noise and draining its battery for no reason. I thought it had a sensor to alert me to stuff like that.
 
Because my brain will at times get a clever idea and then just NOT LET GO OF IT until I haul it to fruition, and because I want it to calm down already so I can get to sleep sometime soon, I present the following:

Code:
Fan on “high,” hear my prayer
In my need, you have always been there
Been so long, need a gale
Let me rest, cool my nest.

Blades of chrome
Made by Holmes
Chill this home

It’s like the Sun that might have grown
If God had planted me a Sun
That Sun is blindin’ and hot
How long I’ll fry, on and on
And I will melt until I’m gone

Bring me breeze, bring me joy
Bring it strong, show me you’re not some toy
You can shake, you can sway
Send some breeze, up my way
Fan on "high," save this guy
Let him live

Blades of chrome
Made by Holmes
Chill this home
I hope you enjoy it as much as the sleep I'm finally going to be able to get. G'night!

--Patrick
 
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Because my brain will at times get a clever idea and then just NOT LET GO OF IT until I haul it to fruition, and because I want it to calm down already so I can get to sleep sometime soon, I present the following:

Code:
Fan on “high,” hear my prayer
In my need, you have always been there
Been so long, need a gale
Let me rest, cool my nest.

Blades of chrome
Made by Holmes
Cool my home

It’s like the Sun that might have grown
If God had planted me a Sun
That Sun is blindin’ and hot
How long I’ll fry, on and on
And I will melt until I’m gone

Bring me breeze, bring me joy
Bring it strong, show me you’re not a toy
You can shake, you can sway
Send some breeze, up my way
Save this guy, fan on “high”
Let me live

Blades of chrome
Made by Holmes
Cool my home
I hope you enjoy it as much as the sleep I'm finally going to be able to get. G'night!

--Patrick
Great, now it's stuck in my head. Or at least, the original version is.
 
Great, now it's stuck in my head. Or at least, the original version is.
It is catchy, isn't it?
I edited a couple lines after you quoted it, thought of something better while I was brushing my teeth.
Just wanna make sure you knew. :)

--Patrick
 
I am simultaneously relieved, excited, scared, and concerned right now.

I go back to my "real" job as a bus driver today - only for "training", but still.
 
Out of curiosity, whose voice do you hear singing that song? I've got Colm Wilkinson.
The Wilkinson version is the one I listened to for reference (because it was the first one I found on iTunes), but I have to admit that Le Miz is another one of those things I've never seen.
Wow, Kelly Preston dead at 57. Always liked her movies. Cancer sucks.
Yes. Especially Metalstorm. But I think I remember her best from Amazon Women.

--Patrick
 
I got an email from a student requesting that our office provide him with a letter for Immigration Canada stating that his presence in Canada is necessary. He's referring to the fact that he can't open a Canadian bank account while overseas. I don't think he quite understands what "necessary" travel means.
 
Remember when I said some people hide their dumbass better than others?

I am not one of those people.

While speaking to a coworker about a guest, I called him by a nickname that had been used among staff. In earshot of said guest. Needless to say he was NOT happy. I apologized at the time, but tonight there was a line of people waiting to take a piece out of my ass. Deservedly so.

So tonight, in front of his coworkers and my manager (they just happened to be outside having a smoke), I addressed him by NAME and told him I was stupid, irresponsible, and lazy. They accepted my apology, shook my hand (don't start, it needed to happen), and we've gone on with the rest of the night.

And my brain will gleefully dredge up this new fuckup when I least expect it for the rest of my life.
 
Remember when I said some people hide their dumbass better than others?

I am not one of those people.

While speaking to a coworker about a guest, I called him by a nickname that had been used among staff. In earshot of said guest. Needless to say he was NOT happy. I apologized at the time, but tonight there was a line of people waiting to take a piece out of my ass. Deservedly so.

So tonight, in front of his coworkers and my manager (they just happened to be outside having a smoke), I addressed him by NAME and told him I was stupid, irresponsible, and lazy. They accepted my apology, shook my hand (don't start, it needed to happen), and we've gone on with the rest of the night.

And my brain will gleefully dredge up this new fuckup when I least expect it for the rest of my life.
Yeah it's fine to feel guilty enough to think you need a smack instead of a hug. But you're getting a hug anyway because I've been there.
This kinda situation is rough. Even as a manager myself I've been here, saying something that shouldn't have been said around certain people. What's awful is that this isn't nearly as much of a problem if it's the guest calling you an unflattering nickname, even to your face.
But you made a mistake, as everyone does. You learned from it. And I seriously doubt you'd ever let it happen again because you ARE the type of person who let's that kind of mistake bother you even years later.
 

figmentPez

Staff member
An adventuring party finds a treasure chest in the dungeon. The rogue examines the chest and cannot find a way to unlock it, so the fighter gets impatient and decides to bash it open. He swings his sword and it slices cleanly through revealing that it was a cake all along. "Well, at least it wasn't a mimic!" The rogue laughs, the party laughs, the cake laughs...
 
And my brain will gleefully dredge up this new fuckup when I least expect it for the rest of my life.
I've done dumb shit before and literally had the thought "please don't let me remember this." I don't know if its ever worked because I've forgotten the times it has.
 
So we got some bells to hang on the doorknob for the dog. So he can ring the bells to let us know he wants to go out.

What actually happens is the cat rings the bells and the dog sprints to the door to see who's at the door.
 
So we got some bells to hang on the doorknob for the dog. So he can ring the bells to let us know he wants to go out.

What actually happens is the cat rings the bells and the dog sprints to the door to see who's at the door.
When I was a kid my mom had a cat that would always nibble the tips of the leaves of her spider plant in the dining room. So one day, she gets the brilliant idea to put tabasco sauce on the leaves to discourage the cat.

From that day forward, at dinner time, the cat would sit at the plant and howl until she put some tabasco on it for the cat to lick off.
 
Someone in the office is microwaving fish for lunch.

It smells awesome.

It smells like it's a Thai dish. The aroma of coconut, lemongrass, and chilies combined with the fish is divine. I want to track down whoever made this fish dish and ask for a recipe.
 
Someone in the office is microwaving fish for lunch.

It smells awesome.

It smells like it's a Thai dish. The aroma of coconut, lemongrass, and chilies combined with the fish is divine. I want to track down whoever made this fish dish and ask for a recipe.
Many years ago, when I was working at Microsoft, someone in one of the buildings dared to microwave fish curry. It. Smelled. Divine. Everyone bitched about it for weeks, but the subtle lingering curry notes really brightened my days in that building until it faded completely.
 
Blotsfan: I don't want 0s for all these fields when I'm testing. I should put in values so I can make sure they're being pulled into the report.

Blotsfan: puts in some variation of 69 every time because sex number.

Report: Every value is 69 making it hard to tell if the data is pulling in from the right place.

Blotsfan:
 
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