I agree whole heartedly except for your ludicrous assertion that vodka belongs in a Martini.My 3 favorite points to argue into the ground for fun
1) Real men drink scotch and do it in a study that the kids/wife isn't allowed in, sitting in a large leather chair by the fireplace in a robe, reading the days wall street journal while murmuring about the instability of North African securities.
2) Top shelf vodka does make sense if you drink martinis, in which case your best choices are Kettle One, Pearl, or Hangar One. Martini's should be drank in a social setting involving both men and women, however, when the men retire to the study to discuss important world issues it is appropriate to switch to scotch.
3) Wine is not alcohol, it is part of a global conspiracy of the omega males and women to introduce estrogen into the stronger men in society. Wine should be immediately recognized as a threat to masculinity, and men promoting it's imbibement should be publicly identified as agents of the feminista underground.
Long ago I watched an episode of COPS. They arrested a guy for selling drugs after arresting some of his clients as they came out of the dealer's house. They go through his pants and find over $5,000 in small bills (huge wads, crumpled up, etc.).Top 3 excuses:
1) "Man, that wasn't me, that was my cousin. You tryin' to say we all look alike?" (His ID was confirmed by 3 witnesses)
2) "She hit me first." (Says the woman who brought a knife to a fist fight)
3) "Man, these ain't even my pants. They my cousin's pants." (Every dirty caught with drugs EVER)
My parents always talk about an episode of Cops where the guy is caught with drugs and he tells the police they aren't his pants. It's become a big joke between the three of us.Top 3 excuses:
1) "Man, that wasn't me, that was my cousin. You tryin' to say we all look alike?" (His ID was confirmed by 3 witnesses)
2) "She hit me first." (Says the woman who brought a knife to a fist fight)
3) "Man, these ain't even my pants. They my cousin's pants." (Every dirty caught with drugs EVER)
That's... what she... said?I'm just holding it for a friend.
It's real, although it's not drugs that he ate.Holy crap that gif is amazing. Is that for real???