You watched the Bumblebee movie recently?Something about this sign seems to speak to me today. Not sure why.
(Bonus Points if you figure it out.)
The Random Crap Thread 2: It Hits the Fan.
- Thread starter North_Ranger
- Start date
figmentPez
Staff member
You've found out how many times you can watch Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock before you just can't take any more?Something about this sign seems to speak to me today. Not sure why.
(Bonus Points if you figure it out.)
It took you 16 hours to get to LA?Something about this sign seems to speak to me today. Not sure why.
(Bonus Points if you figure it out.)
Too much traffic and you can’t pass?
A big black n white crushed your groove?
Did you sign your name to #24?
A judge said he was gonna throw your ass in the city joint?
You’re still mad about 1987?Something about this sign seems to speak to me today. Not sure why.
(Bonus Points if you figure it out.)
—Patrick
Dave
Staff member
I woke up yesterday at 5:30 pm and worked overnight. It was a pretty busy night and I was really tired when I got off late at 8:00 this morning. Also, last night I started cooking my lunch at about 10 pm. I put a pizza in the pizza oven & set the timer for 20 minutes. When it dinged at me I looked and the cheese wasn't even starting to melt. So I extended the timer another 15 minutes and did that continuously until about 11 when I complained to one of the guys I worked with. He commiserated about how old the thing was and saw that the cheese was JUST starting to melt. I set the timer for another 10 minutes. After it dinged I looked and the fucking thing was blacker than a congressman's soul. Burnt to a fucking crisp. In 10 minutes where it did NOTHING for an hour. It was the only thing I had there to eat and since it was overnight nothing was open. I ate a packet of crackers and a bowl of oatmeal I was saving for breakfast.
I picked up a Saturday day shift for someone so I am staying up until about 8 or 9 tonight and then getting up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning. Why am I saying all of this? Because I want to set the mood. I am tired, I was hungry until I finally got home and ate a bowl of cereal. I'm sore from doing physical labor. And I have to stay up. Suffice it to say my mood is not that great. Or, at least it WASN'T.
I had to go to Walmart and pick up a few things. Cat litter, laundry detergent, potatoes for dinner tonight. The place was packed but everyone was polite, people smiled, if anyone got in anyone's way they said sorry and excuse me. Checkout was fast and the lady helping everyone was laughing and talking. She looked like she was enjoying her job! But I'm hungry again since it's lunchtime now. So I go to Chipotle. I get there right behind this dude with a lifted truck and union stickers all over it. I open the door for him and since we're in line we strike up a short conversation. Turns out he was in the army for a long time and we laughed at some things that military people laugh at (generally the more terrible it is, the more fondly we remember them). I gave him crap about his Green Bay Packers cap and he rolled his eyes at my Cowboys one. When I got to the checkout he'd paid for my food. I thanked him and then said, "In that case, I'm paying for THAT guy's!" pointing to the guy behind me. When I left (after talking a bit again with the first guy) I saw the guy who was behind me paying for the lady's order behind him.
I get in my car and someone immediately waves me into traffic and we both smile and wave.
Just like that my mood has changed. I'm in a great mood and am just blown away about how nice everyone has been today.
I picked up a Saturday day shift for someone so I am staying up until about 8 or 9 tonight and then getting up at 5:30 AM tomorrow morning. Why am I saying all of this? Because I want to set the mood. I am tired, I was hungry until I finally got home and ate a bowl of cereal. I'm sore from doing physical labor. And I have to stay up. Suffice it to say my mood is not that great. Or, at least it WASN'T.
I had to go to Walmart and pick up a few things. Cat litter, laundry detergent, potatoes for dinner tonight. The place was packed but everyone was polite, people smiled, if anyone got in anyone's way they said sorry and excuse me. Checkout was fast and the lady helping everyone was laughing and talking. She looked like she was enjoying her job! But I'm hungry again since it's lunchtime now. So I go to Chipotle. I get there right behind this dude with a lifted truck and union stickers all over it. I open the door for him and since we're in line we strike up a short conversation. Turns out he was in the army for a long time and we laughed at some things that military people laugh at (generally the more terrible it is, the more fondly we remember them). I gave him crap about his Green Bay Packers cap and he rolled his eyes at my Cowboys one. When I got to the checkout he'd paid for my food. I thanked him and then said, "In that case, I'm paying for THAT guy's!" pointing to the guy behind me. When I left (after talking a bit again with the first guy) I saw the guy who was behind me paying for the lady's order behind him.
I get in my car and someone immediately waves me into traffic and we both smile and wave.
Just like that my mood has changed. I'm in a great mood and am just blown away about how nice everyone has been today.
I believe my actual response was "No?!"
When I became a parent, I anticipated there were going to be some awkward and unexpected conversations. What I never expected was the following conversation in the car earlier today. (Please keep in mind that, while my son is not stupid, he can be naive, and he can always talk to us about things he's trying to understand.)
The highlights:
-No, "d-bag" is not an actual curse; it's an implied curse.
-No, "d-bag" does not stand for "dick-bag".
-No, I don't know what a "dick-bag" is, either.
-I would prefer you not say "d-bag", even though it's not an actual curse word. If I ever got called into school because you called your teacher a "d-bag", the punishments would never end. I wouldn't recommend using it towards any of your friends if you want them to stay your friends.
-No, "dime bag" is a drug reference, and I don't want you saying that, either.
-Yes, you can say "duck-bag", whatever that is.
-
DUCK-BAG, WOO-HOO!
I don't know how I didn't get into an accident. I was trying to navigate horrendous NY traffic while tears are in my eyes from trying to stifle giggles from what an absurd conversation this was.
The highlights:
-No, "d-bag" is not an actual curse; it's an implied curse.
-No, "d-bag" does not stand for "dick-bag".
-No, I don't know what a "dick-bag" is, either.
-I would prefer you not say "d-bag", even though it's not an actual curse word. If I ever got called into school because you called your teacher a "d-bag", the punishments would never end. I wouldn't recommend using it towards any of your friends if you want them to stay your friends.
-No, "dime bag" is a drug reference, and I don't want you saying that, either.
-Yes, you can say "duck-bag", whatever that is.
-
DUCK-BAG, WOO-HOO!I don't know how I didn't get into an accident. I was trying to navigate horrendous NY traffic while tears are in my eyes from trying to stifle giggles from what an absurd conversation this was.
GasBandit
Staff member
Coming soon: Wolf Shit!-
. . . woo-hoo?
A D-bag is a handbag from Tod's, a luxury leather goods brand. Their D-bag series was named after Princess Diana, as apparently she favored Tod's handbags and so they made this line of bags especially for her.
https://www.tods.com/ca-en/Tod's-D-Bag-Medium/p/XBWDBAA0300RIIG807/
https://www.whowhatwear.com/princess-diana-tods-bag
Although nowdays I believe they tend to call them Di-bags instead of D-bags. I have no idea why they changed the name.
https://www.tods.com/ca-en/Tod's-D-Bag-Medium/p/XBWDBAA0300RIIG807/
https://www.whowhatwear.com/princess-diana-tods-bag
Although nowdays I believe they tend to call them Di-bags instead of D-bags. I have no idea why they changed the name.
Sometimes, when talking with my ex-ex-daughter-in-law (who I'm still friendly with) we have an entire conversation in gifs. And I feel so much like
There's a luggage company that started out with the company name Douchebags. Given that their original target market were hardcore dirtbag-type skiers, it was a pretty funny and smart(?) marketing decision. However, the bags were really good and got very popular, so they felt the need to shed the name and rebrand to something more respectable (Db).
No, I think he meant literally. Thinking about it now, I guess the little bag that male actors put over their junk when filming sex scenes could be a "dick-bag", but to my knowledge that's not what it's called.
Yeah, it's mystery, all right.
Wouldn't that make her your daughter-in-law again?
Right, and "scumbag" is just one of the many synonyms for "condom."
So literally a dick bag.
--Patrick
figmentPez
Staff member
Halforums is getting very close to a million messages:
figmentPez
Staff member
And you've made about 7% of them.
GasBandit
Staff member
Dang, is that all? I've been slacking.
I've made about 7 of them! 
Brilliant idea: remake Rear Window, but with a cat that watches everyone from the window.
Call it Rowr Window.
Call it Rowr Window.
There's a house on the lake for sale that's right down the street from where my sister lives. And it's selling for JUST shy of $2 million. I wouldn't have a clue what I'd do with a mansion like that, but man, it'd be a nice area to live. I've driven and kayaked past this place several times when I was out to my sister's place. You'd have to have a pretty sizeable family just to fill the damn place.
I can only imagine what my sister's place might sell for. It's comparatively smaller, I think, with only 3 bedrooms, but it also has a giant basement where my brother in law has two rooms of pinball machines. He runs a small business building parts for pinball machines. And he's an international pilot. And she has a cushy government job. So it's no surprise they can afford to live on the lake. Mind you, they also built their newer house and did a lot of the work themselves, after having experience flipping a few houses when they were younger.
I can only imagine what my sister's place might sell for. It's comparatively smaller, I think, with only 3 bedrooms, but it also has a giant basement where my brother in law has two rooms of pinball machines. He runs a small business building parts for pinball machines. And he's an international pilot. And she has a cushy government job. So it's no surprise they can afford to live on the lake. Mind you, they also built their newer house and did a lot of the work themselves, after having experience flipping a few houses when they were younger.
Attachments
I'm at the gas station today, and I look over at the car next to me, and... it's Dante from Clerks! Even funnier because the gas station we're at is part of the opening montage of Clerks 2.
No, I didn't get a picture, because a) that would be weird, and b) I was caught off-guard. He wasn't supposed to be there today.
No, I didn't get a picture, because a) that would be weird, and b) I was caught off-guard. He wasn't supposed to be there today.