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I think he has a shitty barber.

The Ewok is half the man he used to be. at least that is the idea...

Wendy's drive thru... OH SHIT IT'S the boss!

If I played Royal Wedding Bingo and took a shot each time the press called Mehgan "Mixed-Race" I would have been passed out on the floor in thirty minutes.

So they had normal Dachshund temperaments, and mixed enough to be able to do something with it...

Ah, I remember when in the good old days, that would be a scandal...

I watched some news segment about it and I heard Yanny every time. Of course it was being played on a potato of a phone and recorded in a higher register than the original recording. It sounded like it was played in a tin can. On my computer at the dictionary website it sounds like Laurel every...

CNN just reported 8 dead.

Pulled fire alarm and started shooting while the students were standing in the field. In Santa Fe, TX.

I hear what it is supposed to be Laurel. I heard that the difference is when the volume is low and the bass drops away. And people that hear higher pitches not lower tones. Maybe that is why kids could not understand my baritone voice when I taught.

More fallout from Jade Helm. https://www.texastribune.org/2018/05/03/hysteria-over-jade-helm-exercise-texas-was-fueled-russians-former-cia-/

I went to my boss's funeral yesterday. I had never been in that church before. I really needed to use the restroom in the worst way. So I hurriedly duck into the restroom, and thought, "Hey this is really nice." I picked a stall half way down, and thought, "Wow. There's a lot of stalls in here...

And people wonder why I don't train Ralph to be a lap dog.

This morning while mowing my yard, my dog wandered off again. I am really trying to get him to stop doing that. However about an hour later, I spot him standing in the neighbor's yard just across the street. I step out on my porch and gesture for him to come. He doesn't. I step inside grab his...

Na, once you give it a hair cut, it would look like a teacup poodle.

Look on the bright side, I did not say what I really meant.

No, use the BSG Cylon sound instead...