Granted! However, they are three of the most mind-numbing days every week and make you desperate for Fridays.
I wish that I had a successful night out with Emma Stone.
I wish that I had a successful night out with Emma Stone.
[Thread Game] Corrupt a wish foundation
- Thread starter Yoshimickster
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Granted! You two have a great night out, really hit it off, and even trade a few flirtatious remarks and touches. At the end of the evening, you walk her to her place, and she asks you teasingly if you'd like to come up for some coffee. So you agree, and you head up into her apartment, where you are immediately beaten up by Andrew Garfield.
I wish I was the ruler of a beautiful planet populated by nothing but beautiful women.
I'm okay with this!Granted! Soon:
I wish for a smartphone.
On a trip to a bar, you notice the guy next to you accidentally left his phone behind when he left. You pick it up and realize it's a prototype iPhone 6. With no way to find the guy who left it there, you claim it for your own. Unfortunately, Apple, having learned their lesson from previous fiascoes, equipped the prototype with an internal self-destruct device. It blows up in the middle of the night, maiming you.
I wish I no longer needed sleep, and could stay awake 24 hours a day with no negative effects.
Granted! However because your life is no like one big day, time begins to lose all meaning to you. You end up forgetting calendars all together, and your schedule is just a mess.
I wish Also Bagels would update again.
Also Bagels is updated...and it's new incarnations is called Now With Lox!
I wish I could invent a transporter.
I wish I could invent a transporter.
Granted: https://www.google.com/search?q=the+fly&tbm=isch
I wish the wires I had to splice in my car tonight weren't encased in this horrible, sticky insulation that required extra work and care to remove without damaging the wires.
I wish the wires I had to splice in my car tonight weren't encased in this horrible, sticky insulation that required extra work and care to remove without damaging the wires.
Granted you spliced the wrong wires. The wires you were suppose to splice, however we're covered in sticky insulation that required extra work
I wish that I could impregnate women at will mwahaha.
GRANTED! However the children of said impregnation immediately turn into Jersey Devil like monsters and each eat a small part of your body.
I wish I had a super jaw, able to bite through anything.
Granted! Your teeth and cranium, however, are not strong enough to support your massive jaw strength. The next time you eat your head collapses in on itself so hard it forms a micro black hole, which dives into the earth and slowly eats away the core of the earth.
But you no longer care.
I still wish for snow.
GRANTED! But Scott Kurtz ruins him by turning him into a terrible running joke.
I wish I could focus.
All the snow on the surface of the earth is instantly tranported to the various islands of Hawaii. It is, in fact, the last thing the inhabitants see.
I wish the person who drove slowly this morning in a 55mph zone would receive whatever they require in their life that would make them comfortable and able to drive at the speed limit safely.
I wish the person who drove slowly this morning in a 55mph zone would receive whatever they require in their life that would make them comfortable and able to drive at the speed limit safely.
Granted! That person requires a lower speed limit. He or she becomes an advocate to have the legal limit dropped to 35 mph, even on highways, using a platform of safety and conservation. Despite any facts to the contrary, the movement picks up popularity and a law is passed to lower speed limits across the US. (Thanks for the statewide avalanche, btw. 
)
I wish I was more creative when it comes to cooking.
)I wish I was more creative when it comes to cooking.
Granted, but your recipes all involve SPAM. So nothing tastes that good.
I wish for a peaceful Christmas.
I wish for a peaceful Christmas.
Granted! You are transported back in time to the Christmas Truce of WW1. The spontaneous ceasefire is heartwarming and a welcome respite from all the fighting, though that doesn't change the fact that you're hundreds of miles from home and have been stuck in a muddy trench for months. It's cold and wet and you haven't had a decent meal or a night's sleep for literally weeks, but at least no one's shooting anyone today, on Christmas.
The next day you're shot by a sniper.
I wish I could be an expert sniper.
Granted. A spy sneaks up behind you and stabs you in the back. Guess the Scout's warnings were right.
I wish for happiness to all of my fellow Halforumites.
I wish for happiness to all of my fellow Halforumites.
GRANTED! However we only get to feel this happiness five seconds before the Vogons destroy the planet.
I wish I could feel more chill.
Granted! One blast from Mr. Freeze's freeze ray and you're certainly feeling more chill.
I wish for the power to cause people to have instant orgasms at will.
I wish for the power to cause people to have instant orgasms at will.
GRANTED! However once you orgasmaray them they don't stop orgasming, and become catatonic.
I wish for a mech suit.
Granted! However, the instruction manual is extremely complicated, so you decide to ignore it and try to figure things out as you go along. Two hours and a destroyed Manhatten later, you've got the entire U.S. military barreling down on you and you still haven't figured out how to activate the protective force fields.
I wish I were more clever.
I wish I were more clever.
GRANTED! However you become so clever that nothing becomes challenging for you. You gain no satisfaction from any accomplishment, and in the end die unsatisfied.
I wish I had a Gatling gun that was light, had no recoil, but was just a powerful as a normal Gatling gun.
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