Dave's House of Pain

[Covar]

What the hell is wrong with you people!? I'm 6-4-0 with an autodraft team! AN AUTO-DRAFT! I get clobbered like I'm the Jacksonville Jaguars when I carefully pick out my team on draft day. The year I give up? 6-4.

I hate you all.

 

[Dave]

If you're sucking and you know it, clap your hair!

 

[Sparhawk]

Yeah, clapping my hair ALL season long...

 

[jwhouk]

Shaddup. I'm just praying Rodgers is healthy enough to help me for the playoffs... IF I get to the playoffs. (Gives Charlie Don't Surf the evil eye...)

 

[klew]

I have 7 players left of my original 16 round draft team, and one is a kicker.

 

[klew]

Stupid, unpredictable Denver receiving corps.

 

[Covar]

I'm pretty sure the weather in Philadelphia is going hurt my team this week, but damn if I don't enjoy watching games like that.

 

[Sparhawk]

I swear that it looked like the players were finding ways to jump into the snow drifts at times. Looked like so much freaking fun.

 

[Covar]

I forgot LaSean McCoy was my starting running back. His extra points have made up for Stafford being unable to put the ball in the air.

 

[Sparhawk]

Finally gonna win another game!

 

[Dave]

Yeah, I lost one of my running backs - Reggie Bush - because he hurt himself in pregame warmups and I didn't find out about it until the game started.

This has not been my year. Again.

 

[jwhouk]

I... I'm not making the playoffs, am I?





(I knew that as soon as the four words were uttered: "Aaron Rodgers is hurt.")

 

[Tress]

I'm on the bubble. I need Dez Bryant to have a mediocre game tonight.

 

[Dave]

I need Dez to have a great night tonight, mainly because the refs wanted Philly to beat Detroit. Some of the calls in that game were absolutely terrible...and they were all against Detroit.

Of course, then Philly went nuts in the running game, so it probably wouldn't have made a difference, but it would have stopped them from scoring at least once.

 

[Tress]

How does Dez Bryant affect you in any way in our fantasy league?

 

[Dave]

Well, in fantasy I have Tony Romo. (Not sure which league.) But as a Cowboys fan, I need them to beat the Bears so that we stay on top of the Division.

 

[Tress]

Beat the Bears as much as you want! Just keep Dez Bryant out of the endzone.

 

[Tress]

Thank you, Jamaal Charles. You wonderful, fantastic man.

Thank you.

 

[jwhouk]

Season in Haiku:
Could have won the title but
Aaron Rodgers hurt

 

[Dave]

I could have won this year, but...
My team ind of sucked.

 

[Holy Knickers]

Congratulations go out to The Cranky Llamas, the 2013 Dave's house of Pain fantasy football champs.

 

[Tress]

Thank you, thank you.

 

[jwhouk]

Just remember, Tress: You got a mulligan this year because of Aaron Rodgers being hurt.

Someday, that title will be MINE! MINE! MINE, I TELL YOU!

 

[Tress]

This is my third championship in 5 years, bud. You know what that spells? D-Y-N-A-S-T-Y. So take your Aaron Rodgers talk somewhere else.

 

[Tress]

@Dave

Spoiler

 

[Dave]

Maybe.

 

[Tress]

 

[jwhouk]

So... are we bracketing or not?

 

[Dave]

I'll be sending something out tomorrow.

 

[Covar]

We drafting soon?

 

[Dave]

I hadn't even thought about doing it again this year.

Let's get a head count of the interested parties.

 

[Charlie Don't Surf]

I'm down

 

[jwhouk]

Me.

 

[Dave]

I renewed the league. You guys should get an email.

 

[Tress]

I'm in. Time to school you guys again.