Yeah, I do get that idea. The opening page of Fade starts with a fridging. I wrote that 10 years ago before I heard of the concept. I can understand what it reads as to a female reader, but to me, the author, the fact that the character is a woman was completely coincidental when I wrote it. The thought that went through my head was, "Who is closest to the protagonist? Whose death will do the most damage?" Because the character is a heterosexual male, that means his girlfriend. The older, smarter me realizes that regardless of that, it's yet another woman's death, and I need to remove it. In fact that whole issue is stupid, and I've marked it as apocryphal.
I mean, I get the interpretation and I agree with you, I really do. And I understand that author intent can be less important than how something reads to people. I took it as Joker being a psychopath, and I kind of liked seeing a superhero shown taken by surprise and vulnerable. Especially a Bat, since they never seem to be taken by surprise at all.