Ah, but if I post it publicly anywhere, I can't recycle it next year!
And honestly, it's even halfway decent, so I'd like to use it in-person if possible. On camera performance is... not a strong suit, I learned that 4 years ago.
And honestly, it's even halfway decent, so I'd like to use it in-person if possible. On camera performance is... not a strong suit, I learned that 4 years ago.
My wife's "honey-do" list for me has gotten longer and longer over the past few days as the Christmas season has gotten her more and more frazzled and sick. She chose to take on more tasks and can never say no to family. When she overburdens herself that means I have more stuff to do. I have a winter semester class to teach the day after Christmas. I've been able to get away to work on campus but it's closed for the next few days. I'm trying to get my lectures pre-recorded but that requires me to have at least an uninterrupted hour to myself. That has become nigh impossible.
Today was supposed to be relaxing and I wanted to get a lot of work done today. That didn't happen because the sister-in-law had a medical appointment yesterday that went way longer than expected. Mom-in-law had to babysit the niece and nephew all afternoon and evening. The wife’s car was in the shop and she couldn’t pick up a bunch of items. They’re really not that important but she thinks she needs them or else Christmas will be ruined, ruined, ruined!
The sister-in-law is supposed to host Christmas dinner tomorrow but she changed the menu at the last second because the nephew must have changed his food preferences again. Of course she caved and some of us had to make a special trip to the grocery store and Costco on Christmas Eve. Seriously, strap the kid into his chair already and don’t let him leave the table until he finishes at least half the goddamn plate. He's a good kid but I can’t abide picky eaters.
I couldn't sit down for ten minutes without hearing "can you go pick up some egg nog?" or "I know this is a big ask but ONE more thing..." I finally got back from a round of errands today when I got sent out AGAIN because she forgot more stuff. She said "I forgot you have work. I can get it if you really need me to," but I know that if she can't spend this time wrapping the presents just right then tomorrow will be ruined, ruined, ruined! And guess who is now on the hook for over $100 in gift cards? Now I finally have some quiet time to work but I know it won't last long before I hear a knock on the door of my study. That's not what worries me, though. I can hear myself starting to get short and terse with her, which makes me feel ashamed. I know she's doing this because she wants a memorable Christmas after the miscarriage. Her holiday mania went into overdrive a couple weeks ago after she went to a coworker's baby shower. I'm trying to not get upset with her but it's getting more difficult.
Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?
Today was supposed to be relaxing and I wanted to get a lot of work done today. That didn't happen because the sister-in-law had a medical appointment yesterday that went way longer than expected. Mom-in-law had to babysit the niece and nephew all afternoon and evening. The wife’s car was in the shop and she couldn’t pick up a bunch of items. They’re really not that important but she thinks she needs them or else Christmas will be ruined, ruined, ruined!
The sister-in-law is supposed to host Christmas dinner tomorrow but she changed the menu at the last second because the nephew must have changed his food preferences again. Of course she caved and some of us had to make a special trip to the grocery store and Costco on Christmas Eve. Seriously, strap the kid into his chair already and don’t let him leave the table until he finishes at least half the goddamn plate. He's a good kid but I can’t abide picky eaters.
I couldn't sit down for ten minutes without hearing "can you go pick up some egg nog?" or "I know this is a big ask but ONE more thing..." I finally got back from a round of errands today when I got sent out AGAIN because she forgot more stuff. She said "I forgot you have work. I can get it if you really need me to," but I know that if she can't spend this time wrapping the presents just right then tomorrow will be ruined, ruined, ruined! And guess who is now on the hook for over $100 in gift cards? Now I finally have some quiet time to work but I know it won't last long before I hear a knock on the door of my study. That's not what worries me, though. I can hear myself starting to get short and terse with her, which makes me feel ashamed. I know she's doing this because she wants a memorable Christmas after the miscarriage. Her holiday mania went into overdrive a couple weeks ago after she went to a coworker's baby shower. I'm trying to not get upset with her but it's getting more difficult.
Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?
Dave
Staff member
Wife and I don't usually buy things for each other for Christmas since we are usually strapped for cash and want to still buy for others. I work tomorrow & Thursday and then we were going to pack up both our dogs and drive to Sam's in Wichita. Now, neither dog has ridden in the car more than a time or two for things like vet visits so they FREAK OUT. Five hours of freaking out. Plus her dogs are herding dogs and kind of assholes so we don't know how they'd react to two new bigger dogs suddenly being there. Plus we'd have to take two cars. PLUS it's my change week so starting Friday I am transitioning from day shift to night shift. So I told her I didn't want to go and that I'd stay home to watch the dogs. And she got me & Zach presents.
So now for her Christmas is completely ruined and I'm sitting here wracked with guilt for staying home and not having a family get together while not getting her a gift. I feel like a fucking asshole.
So now for her Christmas is completely ruined and I'm sitting here wracked with guilt for staying home and not having a family get together while not getting her a gift. I feel like a fucking asshole.
It's not my place and all that, but: it's absolutely understandable that you want to help your significant other to make this The Best Christmas Possible, especially after a traumatic experience....But you also have to be able to tell her that, for it to be that, you also need to be able to be there, mentally and emotionally - you also went through a traumatic loss (and I won't go into the "who has it worse" thing because that's a fool's game), and...;work is work. It's OK to say "I really do want to help you out, and I'll be available to pick things up and run all the errands you want, from 1PM to 5PM, but for my own peace of mind, to be able to enjoy the feast, and because of my work responsibilities, I really need 3 hours in the morning and 2 hours in the afternoon uninterrupted to make recordings and do my things. Anything you want me to take care of or help with - it's OK, just write it down and I'll get to it, I promise!".
Obviously you want to be there for her and help her, but you also need to be protective of your own boundaries. Pushing yourself and your own needs/desires (whether emotional or practical) down and ignoring them in favor of hers will come with a cost at some point. It's a balance, obviously - I'm not saying "stick to your own things and let her stew in her own stuff". And it's also obviously too late by now for Christmas :-D but just....bear in mind that while her desires and needs are important, especially in a difficult time, so are yours.
Bought a car today. Same model as the one it replaces, but much higher trim/options.
I spent about $4k more than I wanted to, which ended up being a little over twice as much as the check from the insurance, and they messed up the paperwork (which I will have to call them about first thing Monday morning), but we will be back to two cars as of Wed.
I had really hoped to use the savings we'd been building to replace the older of our two cars, but I guess I can't complain that we were able to recover so quickly. I mean, I still am going to complain, but mainly under my breath, y'know?
--Patrick
I spent about $4k more than I wanted to, which ended up being a little over twice as much as the check from the insurance, and they messed up the paperwork (which I will have to call them about first thing Monday morning), but we will be back to two cars as of Wed.
I had really hoped to use the savings we'd been building to replace the older of our two cars, but I guess I can't complain that we were able to recover so quickly. I mean, I still am going to complain, but mainly under my breath, y'know?
--Patrick
I'm thinking of talking to my doctor about this, but I was reading about healthy heart rates.
My Fitbit says my resting heart rate is about 44 bpm. That's considered low for my age. It might be a sign of Bradycardia. It might explain why I'm tired all the time and never feel rested.
Given that I bike or walk all the time, I don't know if I should be concerned.
Apparently, the solution to Bradycardia is getting a pacemaker.
I...don't know if I'm ready to have a robo-heart.
My Fitbit says my resting heart rate is about 44 bpm. That's considered low for my age. It might be a sign of Bradycardia. It might explain why I'm tired all the time and never feel rested.
Given that I bike or walk all the time, I don't know if I should be concerned.
Apparently, the solution to Bradycardia is getting a pacemaker.
I...don't know if I'm ready to have a robo-heart.
People who run or bike regularly tend to have lower than average heart-rates. A friend of mine runs marathons, and every time he has to go get his vitals taken they always panic before he tells them he runs marathons.
You should talk to your doctor if you're worried about it, but it's probably just normal for you.
Bradycardia is common in endurance athletes. It's not usually a concern since it's a natural byproduct of the physical activity.
BUT
...if you ever have to go in for any kind of surgical/dental procedure, make SURE your anesthesiologist knows about it. Otherwise they will think the low heart rate means they are giving you too much anesthesia and dial it back--a thing you might not want.
--Patrick
We did the first pregnancy OBGYN visit and while last time they delivered at two hospitals, now they only deliver at one, and not the one we went to. This one notably is farther from where we live, has a worse NICU (they say they deliver at the hospital we were at last time in especially high-risk circumstances), and is a Catholic hospital which well…
edit: never mind her OBGYN said they can do it at the original hospital for her.
edit: never mind her OBGYN said they can do it at the original hospital for her.
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That's ridiculous. So, deceptive.
Dave
Staff member
So you may have noticed we were down. Huh. No, it wasn't me dicking around with the SSL. For some reason the DNS record got erased. Gas & I checked everything out and everything was paid until at LEAST August 20, 2025. So no reason why. I went to the domain host and they wanted information from the SITE host. I got that and then we got the SSL error again but once you said it was safe it would take you to a null page as the IP was bad. I got the right DNS record names and updated the domain host...and then NOTHING worked. I finally got a hold of someone this morning and they told me to...reboot the virtual server. I turned it off & back on again and here we are.
Oh, and I didn't know we were down because I sleep during the day right now. I didn't check my phone until I got to work. And at work we were having an environmental emergency (hydrochloric acid leak) and was trying to juggle all of this. To make it worse, my email is popped from the HF site so I could get no emails and Gas couldn't log in as me because they all asked for email authentication.
See above gif.
Oh, and I didn't know we were down because I sleep during the day right now. I didn't check my phone until I got to work. And at work we were having an environmental emergency (hydrochloric acid leak) and was trying to juggle all of this. To make it worse, my email is popped from the HF site so I could get no emails and Gas couldn't log in as me because they all asked for email authentication.
See above gif.
Do they have a place for a secondary email in case you can't get your email popped again in the future? Always have a backup option available - I work in IT server maintenance and we have backup options to be able to access in case of an outage of what I support.
I suppose I can see how that might, maybe, be considered a higher priority than us. You're forgiven.
This time.