Rant VIII: The Reckoning

I'm at a point now where I realized I've given up. I don't think I'll ever be successful at anything enough to afford my place. I'm absolutely sure that I'm going to remain single the rest of my life. I've pushed away more people than I have reached out or confided in, so I'm living an incredibly lonely, isolated life where I really have no one to talk to anymore.

And really, what's the point? There's no bright light at the end of the tunnel for me. What's the point of having hope? Why bother? I'm a 36 year old loser working a crap minimum wage job, living with his parents, and spending all his free time at home by himself because I have nowhere to go, no one to see, nothing to do. Yeah, I'm almost done my second novel, but whoop-dee-doo. The only people that know about it are family and friends (online and offline friends.) It's pretty clear it's not going to be some kind of success, either.

I don't have any marketable skills and I'm just a mindless, faceless peon that no one gives a shit about. And why should they? I honestly hate the person I've become. I'm bitter, negative, critical of everything I see, and self-centred because I don't know what to talk about with other people. I don't feel I relate with anyone anymore and I feel so goddamn unloved by even my parents that I'm honestly and truly surprised I don't have suicidal thoughts or plans running through my head.
 
I feel so goddamn unloved by even my parents that I'm honestly and truly surprised I don't have suicidal thoughts or plans running through my head.
I wonder if they don't think that being a little abrasive won't "encourage" you to get yourself back on your feet a little sooner.

--Patrick
 

BananaHands

Staff member
GasBandit is clearly the king of gif reactions.

Also, I've spent a combined $90 on application fees ever since my original apartment was infested with cockroaches. I would feel so much more comfortable having a place to put my stuff when I arrive in LA instead of crashing on a friend's couch. :(
 
My sister had to be rushed to hospital last night. She has blood clots in both her lungs. She is only 25...she had a baby just last November.

Dudes, my little sister could have been dead by this morning.

That...that truly freaks me out.
 
Oh dear, misclick! Some kind and omipotent admin please undo my Brofist for LittleSin!!!
I wanted to give her hugs, lots!

I know the feeling from when my brother had a motor bike crash (not his fault that time)...
 

GasBandit

Staff member
FYI you can undo your own ratings... When you click something, look over on the right where the ratings usually are for the "undo rating" link.
 
My sister had to be rushed to hospital last night. She has blood clots in both her lungs. She is only 25...she had a baby just last November.

Dudes, my little sister could have been dead by this morning.

That...that truly freaks me out.
But she's not and that's good in a terrifying way. Keep us posted.
 
I'm at a point now where I realized I've given up. I don't think I'll ever be successful at anything enough to afford my place. I'm absolutely sure that I'm going to remain single the rest of my life. I've pushed away more people than I have reached out or confided in, so I'm living an incredibly lonely, isolated life where I really have no one to talk to anymore.

And really, what's the point? There's no bright light at the end of the tunnel for me. What's the point of having hope? Why bother? I'm a 36 year old loser working a crap minimum wage job, living with his parents, and spending all his free time at home by himself because I have nowhere to go, no one to see, nothing to do. Yeah, I'm almost done my second novel, but whoop-dee-doo. The only people that know about it are family and friends (online and offline friends.) It's pretty clear it's not going to be some kind of success, either.

I don't have any marketable skills and I'm just a mindless, faceless peon that no one gives a shit about. And why should they? I honestly hate the person I've become. I'm bitter, negative, critical of everything I see, and self-centred because I don't know what to talk about with other people. I don't feel I relate with anyone anymore and I feel so goddamn unloved by even my parents that I'm honestly and truly surprised I don't have suicidal thoughts or plans running through my head.
I wish I could convey just how much of the same boat I am in as you. Same age, living with my parents as well, having the same feelings about my future, stuck broke at home, feeling the same way about the bitter person I've become. I know my parents do love me, but I feel like they just don't understand what I'm going through, especially my dad. I'm not suicidal either, but I will admit that I'm kind of disappointed when I wake up the morning. And that's if I sleep well at all.
 
Okay.

So, they think this was caused by her birth control. She switched last week and she has always had trouble with hormonal birth control. This coupled with our family history led to badness.

She should be okay but she has to stay in hospital for a week. Luckily, her baby has started eating solids and can take formula now.

She has to take blood thinners for six months as well.

I'm glad she is okay but daaaamn.
 
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So my ex-girlfriend became screaming mad at me today. I "ruined her fucking life."

I know emotional and probably she doesn't mean it, but damn it hurts.
 
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