Rant VIII: The Reckoning

Mathias

Mathias

Terrik said:
This will be fairly long.

So I found out a couple days ago, that I lost my court case in Shanghai. This is ranty enough, but not the main reason for the rant.

For background, let me tell you what the case was about. back in May, I decided to resign from my teaching position in Wuxi so I could attend school in Fall because I wanted to pursue an education in medicine. I looked carefully over my contract for the terms of resignation and found that they wanted 60 working days notice to resign, and to make sure it didn't interfere with classes. Fair enough. So I told my boss near the end of May that I was leaving 60 working days later (which would be in August). I got a letter of acceptance of resignation from the Head office in Shanghai but instead of agreeing to the stipulated 60 days, they were kicking me out at the end of June. My bosses boss (the head principal) also decided he wasn't going to pay me for July and not allow me to work the summer school. So I was basically looking at losing $8,000. I fought it, told them that if that was the case, then I don't accept the resignation at the end of June (this was in writing and verbal). This went back on and off for 2 months--well into July-- until I said screw it, I'm getting a lawyer. It went to court in September and weeks later I found out I lost. Why? Because the court decided I accepted the resignation. Well gee, if that was true, why did I take it to court, dumbass? Also, why doesn't the school have to follow their own contract? Ironically, it wasn't a Chinese person that screwed me, it was a British principal.

Surely that's the end of the rant though, yes? Well, no. I might be out that money, but at least June was going to bringing home at least $8,000-10,000 of her own for our wedding.

Nope. She based this off what her father received when her mom died, and what her grandfather received when her grandmother died. We'll be lucky to get $4,000. So here I was, looking at a comfortable $15,000-$20,000 to start us off, and we're down to 4k. Oh, and over half of that will go to pay for her green card applications. This whole year I was working my ass off to prep for coming home. I stayed an extra year in China so we could have some more money before I started school, but it's all gone. Lord knows I wanted to start schooling earlier because med school takes long enough as it is. Best part is, since pre-med classes are all undergrad and I already have a bachelor's degree, I pretty much get jack squat for loans. I get $12,000/year for a campus with a cost of attendance of over $20,000.

You sort of accept that if/when you hit med school you're going to take loans unless you're independently wealthy. I at least thought, however, the student loans I got for the undergrad classes would at least cover the cost for undergrad. Now I'm looking at high-interest loans to cover Jun and I for the next year and a half.

Everything I planned on turned out to be wrong. I didn't expected to get royally fucked by my job. I didn't expect her to be bringing less than half of what she thought she would. I didn't expect I wouldn't be able to get normal student loans like everyone else. I almost feel like I made a mistake coming home. At least in China I was living in large, spacious apartments that I could *easily* afford and still have money for nice vacations and going out to eat all time. Now here I am about to get married, broke, and expenses up the ass.

/rant
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Hope this perks up your day a bit.

http://elitedaily.com/life/greatest...lizing-things-didnt-work-youre-better/773523/
 
Bones

Bones

I...can't...sleep.
I dont want a nervous breakdown, but I am running on empty. to many nights sitting up being haunted by my own failure. the sleeping pills only allow me unconsciousness not good slumber. I know whats coming, I am going to "run dry" and "seize" in the next week. I am bailing on the sinking ship that is my current company and leaving my men to go down with the ship. this fact haunts me, I couldn't help my guys to get out, that when push came to shove and the writing was on the wall I bailed like a bilge rat. I didn't tell them I got an offer from another company doing what I already do for a little more money and closer to home. I have given my notice and have been slowly handing over the reins to others. I am basically just doing a few things this coming week before I leave for good. The whole team will get the email tomorrow morning announcing I am done in 7 days.
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
You did what you needed to do. Those others? They saw the writing on the wall as well, but they took the easy way out, which is to complain, stick your head in the sand, and do nothing. Don't feel bad for what you are doing, feel bad for what THEY are NOT.
 
Bones

Bones

Dave said:
You did what you needed to do. Those others? They saw the writing on the wall as well, but they took the easy way out, which is to complain, stick your head in the sand, and do nothing. Don't feel bad for what you are doing, feel bad for what THEY are NOT.
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thanks Dave, That actually made me feel a little better about my choice to get out.
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
When the ship is sinking finding a life raft or swimming is difficult. The easy thing is to hold on to a railing and hope you get rescued. So you are NOT doing the easy thing by leaving. You are doing the smart and difficult thing. So stop asking yourself why you did this and ask yourself why didn't they?
 
Ravenpoe

Ravenpoe

Bones said:
I...can't...sleep.
I dont want a nervous breakdown, but I am running on empty. to many nights sitting up being haunted by my own failure. the sleeping pills only allow me unconsciousness not good slumber. I know whats coming, I am going to "run dry" and "seize" in the next week. I am bailing on the sinking ship that is my current company and leaving my men to go down with the ship. this fact haunts me, I couldn't help my guys to get out, that when push came to shove and the writing was on the wall I bailed like a bilge rat. I didn't tell them I got an offer from another company doing what I already do for a little more money and closer to home. I have given my notice and have been slowly handing over the reins to others. I am basically just doing a few things this coming week before I leave for good. The whole team will get the email tomorrow morning announcing I am done in 7 days.
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This kind of dread is warranted if the sinking ship is in fact an actual sinking ship, and the men on board are going to drown a cold and horrible death.

It's a job. They won't even get soggy*. Unless someone trips over the water cooler. Everyone will be ok.

*Well, they might, I don't know where you work nowadays, maybe leave behind some paper towels.
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
My ever practical sister would tell you, "people quit jobs every day. You owe them your best while you're a part of them and you owe them notice if you leave. Period. Anyone who makes you feel otherwise is being unfair."

It's kind of you to care about them, it really is. But you've gotta look out for you. Really Dave said it all. I hope you feel better.
 
fade

fade

Staff member
My wife is very practical like that, but I'm more like Bones. You spend 8 hours or more a day with these people, so it's hard not to think of them as family.
 
jwhouk

jwhouk

Dear people of NC Wisconsin,

STOP USING THE TERM 'SOUNDS GOOD' AS A END-OF-PHONE CONVERSATION TERM!!!!


Sincerely,
Me
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
fade said:
My wife is very practical like that, but I'm more like Bones. You spend 8 hours or more a day with these people, so it's hard not to think of them as family.
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That's how I felt when I told my sister I wanted to start looking for a new job. I hate to leave the people I like so much, but employees come and go, and that's just how life is. I'm more referring to how the higher-ups might feel about it. If they can't handle reasonable resignations, they should probably quit themselves and get a new line of work.
 
Bones

Bones

Emrys said:
What's happening?
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I am a snake to go work for non-direct competitor(and thus not violate my anti-comp clause), That I didnt tell anyone my plans until after i had secured my new job. My Boss doesnt exist any more(long story) so his bosses got my letter. Their response was silence, I got the details worked out with other department heads that are assuming my responsilbilities as my department is shuttered. I let my guys know offically today this will be my last week with the company and I wished them nothing but the best. The general feeling is I betrayed them and left them afloat in the company without a leader. Some of them will be abosrbed into other departments, some will be layed off. Right now I am sitting in my office alone listening to them piss and moan to each other what a dick I am to take my "golden parachute".
 
Bones

Bones

Emrys said:
Wait a second, you're going to a new job, you've given them standard notice, and they're whining about it?
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i am not required to tell my subordinates anything, it is a courtesy on my part that i will be out in a week.I gave my standard notice last week to my superiors. I am still tired, but its been cathartic to basically have my guys burn our business relationships. this is in no way the same but i kind of feel like gasbandit felt last year. the feeling that i fucked up is almost gone and the feeling that they are lazy asshats is growing. so its good, maybe ill sleep a bit better tonight.
 
Dave

Dave

Staff member
Bones said:
i am not required to tell my subordinates anything, it is a courtesy on my part that i will be out in a week.I gave my standard notice last week to my superiors. I am still tired, but its been cathartic to basically have my guys burn our business relationships. this is in no way the same but i kind of feel like gasbandit felt last year. the feeling that i fucked up is almost gone and the feeling that they are lazy asshats is growing. so its good, maybe ill sleep a bit better tonight.
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Dave is always right. Remember that.
 
LordRendar

LordRendar

What Adam said.

Your friends will tell you to go get that job,even if they work at the same company you do. Co-Workers will ask you where you are applying and try to steal the position.
 
bhamv3

bhamv3

Did anyone try to seduce you into staying? I'm 80% sure that when I handed in my notice in my last job, my female supervisor tried to do something like that with me.
 
A

Anonymous

Anonymous

So a group I am associated with has been having some issues lately. It kinda came to a head this week and now we're dealing with drama. The member in question is kind of a control freak but it's because she's a professional and we are all amateurs. So she knows her stuff. But she's been gone more and more for her actual profession and has been dropping the ball with things like contracts to customers, making phone calls, etc. So I've stepped up and taken over a large part and it's been very successful for us. Today she quit and did so in a hail of farewells and fuck yous. On the one hand she said we're not respecting her because we're not asking for enough money, and then she says we don't have the talent needed to put out the product we are offering. She stated that she has so much to do, yet she has no job and only does her other profession, which has a LOT of downtime.

So we'r now picking up the pieces and thankfully have four months before it becomes a real issue. So we're scrambling to work on our own stuff and we're going to prove her wrong.

I know I'm being very cagey here, but I know she comes on here because we have a hidden sub board for our group.
 
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