Rant VIII: The Reckoning

I had a therapist who wanted me to keep a journal. But all he wanted in it was specific activity. Even when I wrote about actually being held up at gunpoint, he was upset that I didn't say If I did said activity that week. I was like "I HAD A GUN AT MY HEAD. That's a little more important."
 
That's what bro-fist is for, man
I know, but I wanted something less “I feel ya/I know that's right” and more “I've been dragged through very similar situations and know that feeling very well" but we don't have any kind of "broference" rating and I could only choose one.

--Patrick
 
For someone who tries to avoid being misunderstood, you sure have an oblique way of communicating.
Yeah, I don't get why it's so hard, either. But now you know why I put so much effort into avoiding being misunderstood. If only that guaranteed success every time.

--Patrick
 
Starting my year by being incredibly sick (not covid).

Spoiler for tmi
I’ve had a stomach bug for the last few days and I have spent the last 24 hours shitting constantly, and now this morning they’ve decided to add vomiting to the mix.

I feel like trash and I have a friend in town who I barely get to see so not only do I feel like I’m wasting her trip, but I also am struggling trying to do what I can to host. The whole reason for her coming was to go to the Bills-Falcons game tomorrow, and there’s just no way I can do that if I’m like this. Just a really lame situation.
 

Dave

Staff member
There are times I fucking hate this country. I have a decent job. I have insurance. But I also have bad teeth. So today - for the first time since about 1993 or so - I went to the dentist. I figured that I'd have to get dentures thanks to the degeneration of my teeth, but I had no idea that I was going to be basically priced out of care.

Here are my options. Numbers are approximate.
  1. Put up with what I have. Free but I have to walk around with fucked up teeth.
  2. George Washington style dentures. $3672 NOT counting extractions or the oral surgery or extractions.
  3. Mid-tier partials with some posts/implants. About the cost of a new car. NOT counting the oral surgery or extractions.
  4. Gold tier - Full implants. $80,000+, mostly because each implant would be $2,500. Still does not include oral surgery or extractions.
So how much does my insurance pay? $2000. After that it's my Health Savings Account, which right now has about $5,000 in it.

I guess I just get to walk around until my teeth all fall out. OR I could hire someone to beat the shit out of me & knock all my teeth out so it would be medical.

Or fly to another country and have the work done.

Fuck this country.
 
There are times I fucking hate this country. I have a decent job. I have insurance. But I also have bad teeth. So today - for the first time since about 1993 or so - I went to the dentist. I figured that I'd have to get dentures thanks to the degeneration of my teeth, but I had no idea that I was going to be basically priced out of care.

Here are my options. Numbers are approximate.
  1. Put up with what I have. Free but I have to walk around with fucked up teeth.
  2. George Washington style dentures. $3672 NOT counting extractions or the oral surgery or extractions.
  3. Mid-tier partials with some posts/implants. About the cost of a new car. NOT counting the oral surgery or extractions.
  4. Gold tier - Full implants. $80,000+, mostly because each implant would be $2,500. Still does not include oral surgery or extractions.
So how much does my insurance pay? $2000. After that it's my Health Savings Account, which right now has about $5,000 in it.

I guess I just get to walk around until my teeth all fall out. OR I could hire someone to beat the shit out of me & knock all my teeth out so it would be medical.

Or fly to another country and have the work done.

Fuck this country.
Teeth? You mean optional luxury bones?
 
There are times I fucking hate this country. I have a decent job. I have insurance. But I also have bad teeth. So today - for the first time since about 1993 or so - I went to the dentist. I figured that I'd have to get dentures thanks to the degeneration of my teeth, but I had no idea that I was going to be basically priced out of care.

Here are my options. Numbers are approximate.
  1. Put up with what I have. Free but I have to walk around with fucked up teeth.
  2. George Washington style dentures. $3672 NOT counting extractions or the oral surgery or extractions.
  3. Mid-tier partials with some posts/implants. About the cost of a new car. NOT counting the oral surgery or extractions.
  4. Gold tier - Full implants. $80,000+, mostly because each implant would be $2,500. Still does not include oral surgery or extractions.
So how much does my insurance pay? $2000. After that it's my Health Savings Account, which right now has about $5,000 in it.

I guess I just get to walk around until my teeth all fall out. OR I could hire someone to beat the shit out of me & knock all my teeth out so it would be medical.

Or fly to another country and have the work done.

Fuck this country.
I feel you @Dave. The wife just had a bunch of ortho work done for over $2k. It's not fun.
 
The new psychiatrist I've been seeing wanted to have a meeting with my parents; partly because they'd know me well, and partly because we live together.

During that meeting, Dad relayed that my sister, who is a high school teacher, believed I might show all the signs of Asperger's syndrome. Or at least somewhere on the autism spectrum. I spoke to my family doctor about this and he'll see if he can find an autism specialist.

And I just...I don't know. I really don't know. I've been diagnosed and re-diagnosed so many times throughout my life that I don't know what to believe anymore. First it was depression, then seasonal depression, then bi-polar II, then other things I can't even remember. And throw in ADHD a few times, too.

I'm not convinced I'm on the spectrum, though glancing at the symptoms for adults, some ring true. Like hyperfocusing, but that's also a symptom of ADHD. I'm not against getting diagnosed for this and would accept the results. I just don't see how it would help anymore. I feel so stuck in my life in multiple ways that I truly don't believe I can get out of it anymore.
 
While a diagnosis is good, I know the feeling of being bounced around between diagnoses. You're sadly not alone, and especially in adults it can be really hard to properly differentiate. Lots of such things having similar symptoms or tells. Also, things rarely come alone, making it hard to find which belong together. Is it bipolar and ADHD? Or depressed and Asperger's? Or... Yeah, that can be a long road.
Realistically, unless they suddenly find a micro tumor on some gland somewhere that will magically transform you as if you're in a House episode, no diagnosis will entail a sudden easy cure. A proper diagnosis can still help in knowing how to treat certain aspects, how to learn to live with others, and even, help define what "normal" or "successful" is. If you're blind in one eye, everyone will understand you'll never be as good a F1 driver or archer as someone else - even if you can perhaps learn either by compensating and trying hard. Psychological issues are much the same... But if you're failing at driving, knowing whether it's because you can't see out of your eye, or because you have a lame arm, or you're shaking and trembling, can still help in finding what solutions might help, and which would be utterly useless. Putting up extra fat view mirrors can help if you're half blind, but only if they're in the right spots - if they're outside your vision they won't help a bit. Likewise, if you're having trouble because of a lame arm, having more mirrors won't change a thing.
 
I'm not convinced I'm on the spectrum, though...some ring true. Like hyperfocusing, but that's also a symptom of ADHD.
I feel ya there. My childhood was... eventful, and so people take my introversion and lack of expression as an indication that I must be somewhere over in Aspergers territory. No, I just developed a defense mechanism early on where I never outwardly show what I am thinking, plus I am ADHD which means I frequently miss social cues. I don't say this because I feel like Aspergers has some kind of stigma associated with it and am trying to avoid it, I (and also the professionals I've talked to) just feel it is coincidence.

--Patrick
 
I just got my first paycheque from the job I started a few weeks ago.

80 hours of work and I'm looking at 677.00 take home, because we were outright lied to in onboarding about holiday pay and everyone in my training group is missing whole days from their cheque.

I broke down and cried. This is it I guess.

Guess that roast I planned to buy for the weekend is rice now. Not the good rice but the kind that comes in a burlap sack with a warning about dangerous spiders that may have hitched a ride inside.
 
There are times I fucking hate this country. I have a decent job. I have insurance. But I also have bad teeth. So today - for the first time since about 1993 or so - I went to the dentist. I figured that I'd have to get dentures thanks to the degeneration of my teeth, but I had no idea that I was going to be basically priced out of care.

Here are my options. Numbers are approximate.
  1. Put up with what I have. Free but I have to walk around with fucked up teeth.
  2. George Washington style dentures. $3672 NOT counting extractions or the oral surgery or extractions.
  3. Mid-tier partials with some posts/implants. About the cost of a new car. NOT counting the oral surgery or extractions.
  4. Gold tier - Full implants. $80,000+, mostly because each implant would be $2,500. Still does not include oral surgery or extractions.
So how much does my insurance pay? $2000. After that it's my Health Savings Account, which right now has about $5,000 in it.

I guess I just get to walk around until my teeth all fall out. OR I could hire someone to beat the shit out of me & knock all my teeth out so it would be medical.

Or fly to another country and have the work done.

Fuck this country.
I haven't been to the dentist since I was a cop. I'm dreading it now for this exact reason. Good to live in a country with basic healthcare, but basic healthcare never includes eyes or teeth.
 
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I just got my first paycheque from the job I started a few weeks ago.

80 hours of work and I'm looking at 677.00 take home, because we were outright lied to in onboarding about holiday pay and everyone in my training group is missing whole days from their cheque.

I broke down and cried. This is it I guess.

Guess that roast I planned to buy for the weekend is rice now. Not the good rice but the kind that comes in a burlap sack with a warning about dangerous spiders that may have hitched a ride inside.
wtaf, i made that much in a week as a salesman at my job, I make double that as the department head where i was a salesman.
 
There are times I fucking hate this country. I have a decent job. I have insurance. But I also have bad teeth. So today - for the first time since about 1993 or so - I went to the dentist. I figured that I'd have to get dentures thanks to the degeneration of my teeth, but I had no idea that I was going to be basically priced out of care.

Here are my options. Numbers are approximate.
  1. Put up with what I have. Free but I have to walk around with fucked up teeth.
  2. George Washington style dentures. $3672 NOT counting extractions or the oral surgery or extractions.
  3. Mid-tier partials with some posts/implants. About the cost of a new car. NOT counting the oral surgery or extractions.
  4. Gold tier - Full implants. $80,000+, mostly because each implant would be $2,500. Still does not include oral surgery or extractions.
So how much does my insurance pay? $2000. After that it's my Health Savings Account, which right now has about $5,000 in it.

I guess I just get to walk around until my teeth all fall out. OR I could hire someone to beat the shit out of me & knock all my teeth out so it would be medical.

Or fly to another country and have the work done.

Fuck this country.
I don't know how far you live from Lincoln, but why not go to UNMC dental school. The cost will certainly be lower. The flip side however, is dental schools move slower with work (it's an academic institution after all), and not all cases will necessarily be deemed "teachable". If they have residency programs in the school, you might be sent to the prosthodontics or oral surgery to get some of the more specialized aspects of your treatment done. It's worth a shot anyhow. Some places (like my school) also offer "charity care" which slashes the prices further if you have financial need.
 

Dave

Staff member
I make too much money for charity care or school aided care. But the reality is, with insurance as worthless as it is for dental, I would have to use all of my excess income to get anywhere.
 
I make too much money for charity care or school aided care. But the reality is, with insurance as worthless as it is for dental, I would have to use all of my excess income to get anywhere.
Dental schools don't check or ask your income level. I've worked on rich and poor alike. They want patients to come, because that's the only way to train new dentists. Charity care is offered to entice patients to stick with the school because students need the experience anyhow. Usually it's something along the lines of "I can't afford this" is enough, although I'm sure the policy varies from school to school. Even if you don't get offered charity care, baseline dental school prices are still a fraction of the price. Example: Oral surgery tooth extraction "in the real world" is $250-300/tooth. At my school it's $55/tooth--which is something they can do because they run as non-profit (like pretty much any dental school). A full set of non-implant supported dentures run $525 per arch. $500 for a Porcelain/metal crown which usually runs at least a grand in a normal practice. I'd say generally you get 50+% discounted prices on most dental treatments.

And yeah, I don't like dental insurance either. My own dental insurance denied my root canal. I was lucky enough to have a preceptor work on me and charge the materials only. I've been paying Guardian for 5 years and naturally they didn't come through. They scam dentists and patient's alike. If I ever end up owning my practice the first thing I'll look into is running a fee for service practice and avoid the whole thing entirely. One can hope.
 
And yeah, I don't like dental insurance either. My own dental insurance denied my root canal. I was lucky enough to have a preceptor work on me and charge the materials only. I've been paying Guardian for 5 years and naturally they didn't come through. They scam dentists and patient's alike. If I ever end up owning my practice the first thing I'll look into is running a fee for service practice and avoid the whole thing entirely. One can hope.
My endodontist was a merciful god to me when i didnt have the money upfront for a root canal and had a raging abscess. My insurance both medical and dental basically went, HAH die...
 

Dave

Staff member
Interesting. When I inquired about the charity and schooling I was told point blank that they thought I made too much money and was then told they weren’t taking any new patients. I was probably just getting brushed off.
 
My mom and grandparents just started a cruise to Antarctica. Apparently today my grandpa fell on the ship and broke his hip. He will need to be med-evaced to a hospital, though whether that's going to be here or Argentina remains to be seen. Especially since Argentina isn't really letting people come in due to covid reasons (there was a very strict procedure from when they flew in to the country to when they got on the boat). Not to mention he's in his 80s so even once he gets the surgery, I feel like there is a good chance he's just going to have permanent quality of life loss.
 
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